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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
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Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Today, my husband tried to haggle a blowjob out of me in exchange for taking his first shower in nearly two weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37120) - you deserved it (5780)
On 04/19/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42334) - you deserved it (8122)
On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)
Today, my long-distance girlfriend drunk dialed me and told me she was horny. Surprised, I exclaimed, "You're horny?" without realizing my boss was right next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36767) - you deserved it (16269)
On 04/19/2013 at 2:00am - intimacy - by Wallz99 (man) - Pakistan (Azad Kashmir)
Today, I was at my little girl's concert. She plays the clarinet, and in the middle of her solo, her phone started ringing. She decided to stop, check her phone, and continue playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36684) - you deserved it (10491)
On 04/18/2013 at 7:01pm - kids - by Aberrombie Blue - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I had a job interview with a man that I got drunk with at a bar on Saturday night. He spent an hour telling me things I did that I don't even remember. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32776) - you deserved it (17603)
On 04/17/2013 at 11:25am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (52930) - you deserved it (9749)
On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54736) - you deserved it (14240)
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (56088) - you deserved it (9425)
On 04/16/2013 at 9:27am - intimacy - by notacaveman (man) - Netherlands
Today, working in customer support, I received a call from a woman who'd just been robbed. My supervisor asked what was taking so long; I told him that she was hysterical. He took my phone and told her to call back when she had her "shit together", then hung up. I take orders from this man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35616) - you deserved it (3010)
On 04/16/2013 at 6:50am - work - by no compassion - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was about to break up with my psycho girlfriend. As I sat her down, she told me she wanted to show me something. She then took off her shirt to reveal my name tattooed across her chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59891) - you deserved it (6186)
On 04/16/2013 at 3:23am - love - by guess I'm stuck - United States (California)
Today, my ex-boyfriend, with whom I'm still madly in love, called me and begged me to come back to him. In shock, I asked, "Is this some kind of joke?" He giggled, said yes, and then promptly hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51089) - you deserved it (5564)
On 04/15/2013 at 10:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57760) - you deserved it (3129)
On 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm - love - by lonely (woman) - United States
Today, I baked my friend a cake for his 21st birthday. When I arrived at his house, his girlfriend, who hadn't made him anything, screamed at me for "making her look bad." She then took the cake, banned me from the party, and kicked me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42773) - you deserved it (3563)
On 04/14/2013 at 10:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54547) - you deserved it (9167)
On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47241) - you deserved it (5707)
On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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