About shorty6823 : Going to school to become a Veterinary Technician. Band geek and a part time farm girl. Message me, I always answer.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20733) - you deserved it (2239)
On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34005) - you deserved it (7012)
On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15320) - you deserved it (34528)
On 01/27/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I saw a woman breast feeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29199) - you deserved it (3127)
On 01/23/2013 at 3:33am - misc - by TheLastSerenade (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29557) - you deserved it (2564)
On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States
Today, I got home only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming the freezing streets calling his name, I returned to find him stuck behind the couch with my chewed-up new shoes in his muzzle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21416) - you deserved it (4390)
On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (5878)
On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (30093)
On 01/02/2013 at 10:01am - misc - by AmberHavoc - United Kingdom
Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (7081)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38216) - you deserved it (2971)
On 12/30/2012 at 1:29am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17797) - you deserved it (1549)
On 11/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had to go to my daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with my husband when we arrived. Apparently I "died" recently and my daughter has had extra responsibility around the house, hence why she doesn't come to class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20217) - you deserved it (1346)
On 11/08/2012 at 6:09am - kids - by Shauna (woman) - United States
Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16977) - you deserved it (1087)
On 10/19/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by NoorFML - United States (Louisiana)
Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17002) - you deserved it (1070)
On 10/07/2012 at 5:41pm - kids - by Skidmark Sally - United States (New Mexico)
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17426) - you deserved it (1859)
On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Monday 17 June 2013
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