![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About shoot_me : Quotes to live by:
"Life is crazy...for if it wasn't, it wouldn't be worth living!"
"Get it done, or be done."
“To be hurt by love, is better than to be hurt by hate”
“Procrastination is to indulge in early, false, gratification”
"To expereince life is to go through great pain and great pleasure...I'm still awaiting the latter."
"It is not about how well you write, but about how well you make bull $@#% sound"
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was driving home, it was 80 degrees out. Making a rare attempt to be eco-friendly, I turned off the A/C and lowered the windows. A bee then flew in through the window, hit my cheek, and stung me. That's what I get for attempting to be eco-friendly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34874) - you deserved it (7754)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, before going to bed my phone lit up and I got all excited because I thought it was a text message. My phone was finished charging. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19508) - you deserved it (32626)
On 05/03/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by nolove (woman) - Canada
Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44929) - you deserved it (7620)
On 04/23/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I got a email from my boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know what is more depressing, getting fired from a job twice or the fact it took two months for them to notice I wasn't there anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52411) - you deserved it (2069)
On 04/21/2009 at 11:11am - work - by laxguy23 (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I found my phone under the car seat after three days. I flipped it open ready to issue apologies to everyone who had tried to get in touch with me and I had worried. No missed calls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61545) - you deserved it (7245)
On 04/16/2009 at 6:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was petsitting for my neighbor's new puppy. A huge thunderstorm came, and the puppy started whining and shivering violently. I pulled it into my lap to try and comfort it. One loud clap of thunder later, and the puppy had explosive diarrhea all over me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70859) - you deserved it (5982)
On 04/16/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by Puppysit88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut M&M's at work when I exclaimed "oh cool they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes but I did eventually realize that I was looking at a regular M&M sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers uncontrollable laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9297) - you deserved it (53833)
On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9943) - you deserved it (92057)
On 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mom and I went to Winn-Dixie. I told her I was going to a different isle 5 minutes later I hear my name on the intercom to go to the front of the store. As I go I see my mom crying, she comes and hugs me and tells me she thought I was lost. Im 22, I had my cell phone, and I drove there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86315) - you deserved it (3895)
On 04/15/2009 at 2:38pm - misc - by SwimSquid (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had horrible pains in my stomache area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25388) - you deserved it (38537)
On 04/14/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by blehh (man) - United States
Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML
I agree, your life sucks (80922) - you deserved it (16587)
On 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm - misc - by anonymiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I called my favorite radio station over and over, trying to be the 40th caller to win sold-out concert tickets, each time holding my thumb over the button to quickly hang up and re-dial if busy. I finally got through and they congratulated me being the winning caller! By habit, I hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27103) - you deserved it (56800)
On 04/13/2009 at 11:41am - misc - by LonelyFrog (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was sitting using my laptop, I was also eating a bag of starbursts. They bag slid off the bed, I went to catch them and in the process my knee hit my laptop which flew off the bed onto the wooden floor, and shattered. I broke my $2,500 laptop to save 11 starbursts from falling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20514) - you deserved it (39475)
On 04/12/2009 at 2:50am - misc - by MYLIFESUX (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to Britney's concert. About halfway through the show, the person next to me turns to me and asks, "Can you do me a favour?" Thinking that she wanted me to look after her stuff, I said sure. Her next sentence was: "Can you stop singing?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26901) - you deserved it (28412)
On 04/11/2009 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26518) - you deserved it (45634)
On 04/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by ripped (man) - Canada (Ontario)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
