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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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shea627

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shea627
  • Town/Country : Cleveland, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 June 1995 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 704
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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shea627's favorite FMLs

Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML

#18490582 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (6375) - you deserved it (26626)

On 12/11/2011 at 11:46pm - work - by stinky (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML

#17743862 (240)

I agree, your life sucks (11175) - you deserved it (692)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (18885) - you deserved it (1873)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (22917) - you deserved it (3717)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was asked how far I've gone with a guy. My answer? Eye contact. I'm 19. FML

#17420241 (361)

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (5230)

On 08/09/2011 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML

#17227905 (431)

I agree, your life sucks (49199) - you deserved it (5135)

On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States

Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML

#15691583 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (26158) - you deserved it (3567)

On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

#15105515 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (11754) - you deserved it (32703)

On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML

#14694098 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (19877) - you deserved it (4237)

On 01/24/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by crayons128 - United States

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (18384) - you deserved it (4097)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

#13930948 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (24497) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/21/2010 at 10:42pm - animals - by dickwebs - Germany

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

#13896400 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (28351) - you deserved it (9243)

On 11/19/2010 at 2:47am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my house is suffering from an infestation of these tiny black beetles. After brushing my teeth tonight, I was rinsing out my toothbrush when I found that one of the beetles had curled up to die between the bristles. FML

#13883549 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (2432)

On 11/18/2010 at 12:04am - health - by twice-a-day (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I played a volleyball game at my school. Not only did I miss the winning point, the ball hit my face in the process, which resulted in popping a big fat zit on my nose. FML

#13797230 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (16695) - you deserved it (3164)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by iharethissomuxh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (35731) - you deserved it (12164)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)