shazzahllala

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shazzahllala

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4684
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shazzahllala : http://twitter.com/Shazzahllala

shazzahllala's page activity

Visits<b>aegan6969</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 12:14pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:18am<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 11:29am<b>carebear1228</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:59pm<b>venomousflower</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:56pm<b>ThisIsMyUsernam</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 10:17am<b>captain_mal</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 2:48am<b>Imacutiez</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 3:35pm<b>Radioactive_Kiwi</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 12:01am<b>strawnelson</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 9:48am<b>Dugas72</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 5:53pm<b>sspence</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 11:39pm<b>VodkaOfBears</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 8:43pm<b>typical_girl_</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:26am<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 3:01am<b>RutnaPapagia</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:30pm

shazzahllala's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shazzahllala's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

by ohgod / 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

by oldtexas / 08/13/2009 at 3:27am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

by JPF / 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

by maidmyday / 08/12/2009 at 10:25am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

by ahhahaha / 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2009 at 12:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, the car I was in got pulled over by the police for making an illegal turn. I was in a cab. And he kept the meter running. FML

by LT / 08/07/2009 at 2:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, my parents came to the restaurant I work at as a waiter. After, I picked up the check to realize they had left me a $500 tip! We split the tips among the employees so I only got $50 back but I was still psyched. When I got home they asked me if I had noticed that they used my credit card. FML

by goin4broke / 08/07/2009 at 11:23am / United States (West Virginia) / Money

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

by scaredshitless / 08/07/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML

by smiletellsall / 08/06/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

by daddysboy123 / 08/06/2009 at 11:40am / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 2:13am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was puked on for the third time in three years at our annual choir concert. What makes it so significant? The fact that the same guy pukes on me every year from stage fright. We're arranged alphabetically, and he's always in the row RIGHT above me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 5:27pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML

by Angry / 08/04/2009 at 4:21pm / United States / Love