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shazzahllala

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shazzahllala
  • Town/Country : Burnaby, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3475
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shazzahllala : http://twitter.com/Shazzahllala

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shazzahllala's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57155) - you deserved it (6893)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

#4495233
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7627) - you deserved it (59190)

On 08/13/2009 at 3:27am - misc - by oldtexas (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

#4488799
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94182) - you deserved it (4542)

On 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm - intimacy - by JPF (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

#4472401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45817) - you deserved it (6438)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by maidmyday (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

#4440172
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44693) - you deserved it (6832)

On 08/11/2009 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the car I was in got pulled over by the police for making an illegal turn. I was in a cab. And he kept the meter running. FML

#4362342
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39911) - you deserved it (1864)

On 08/07/2009 at 2:29pm - misc - by LT (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

#4361327
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46101) - you deserved it (6087)

On 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by piratequeen (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my parents came to the restaurant I work at as a waiter. After, I picked up the check to realize they had left me a $500 tip! We split the tips among the employees so I only got $50 back but I was still psyched. When I got home they asked me if I had noticed that they used my credit card. FML

#4359168
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53895) - you deserved it (5957)

On 08/07/2009 at 11:23am - money - by goin4broke (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

#4350390
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (47283)

On 08/07/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by scaredshitless (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML

#4343153
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57985) - you deserved it (2503)

On 08/06/2009 at 7:41pm - work - by smiletellsall (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

#4332975
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46827) - you deserved it (4164)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:40am - misc - by daddysboy123 (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

#4326730
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45616) - you deserved it (15400)

On 08/06/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was puked on for the third time in three years at our annual choir concert. What makes it so significant? The fact that the same guy pukes on me every year from stage fright. We're arranged alphabetically, and he's always in the row RIGHT above me. FML

#4313444
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47923) - you deserved it (3824)

On 08/05/2009 at 5:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML

#4285765
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43808) - you deserved it (6200)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:21pm - love - by Angry (woman) - United States



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