shazzahllala

Search for a member

shazzahllala

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5526
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shazzahllala : http://twitter.com/Shazzahllala

shazzahllala's page activity

Visits<b>aegan6969</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 12:14pm<b>Spencyy</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 10:18am<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 11:29am<b>carebear1228</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:59pm<b>venomousflower</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 5:56pm<b>ThisIsMyUsernam</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 10:17am<b>captain_mal</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 2:48am<b>Imacutiez</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 3:35pm<b>Radioactive_Kiwi</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 12:01am<b>strawnelson</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 9:48am<b>Dugas72</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 5:53pm<b>sspence</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 11:39pm<b>VodkaOfBears</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 8:43pm<b>typical_girl_</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:26am<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 3:01am<b>RutnaPapagia</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 6:30pm

shazzahllala's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shazzahllala's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that even though they say that an apple a day keeps the doctor away, it doesn't keep him from putting a Q-tip up your ass. FML

by captainkevineff / 03/11/2010 at 9:44am / United States / Health

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was invited to a birthday dinner at a restaurant. As I was leaving, I get a text from the birthday girl's boyfriend saying that it was cancelled. Hungry, I decided to go to that particular restaurant anyway. Turns out the party wasn't cancelled. Half the party just didn't want me there. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2009 at 12:24am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

by BEE / 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me he always thought the female orgasm was an urban legend. FML

by 310 / 10/09/2009 at 2:42am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, when approaching a stop light on my motorcycle, I went to extend my left leg as usual to balance when stopped. Apparently my shoelace loop got wrapped around the shift lever and "tied" my shoe to the bike. It's hard to look cool when you fall over for no apparent reason at a stoplight. FML

by Crotch_Rocket_Rider / 10/06/2009 at 1:33pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, after an amazing sex session, my boyfriend rolls over and stares lovingly into my eyes, puts his hand on my cheek caressing it tenderly... and says "Who's a good piggy?" in his best Homer Simpson's voice. FML

by homersgirl / 09/30/2009 at 4:28am / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number I wanted to mess with my girl a little. I started sending her provocative messages, and after 4 or 5 of them, I discovered I had entered her number wrong and was talking dirty to a man named Noah. FML

by pummy / 09/29/2009 at 8:48pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

by SnuggieOverload / 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, I met my boyfriend's father for the first time. We were at a restaurant and my bofriend kept playing footsie with me under the table. When my boyfriend excused himself to go to the restroom, the game of footsie was still going on. FML

by ohcrap / 09/28/2009 at 12:10am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML

by e11ie / 09/27/2009 at 4:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to start making healthier decisions. Instead of the usual cheeseburger I have for lunch I ate an apple instead. I took one bite and broke one of my teeth. Apparently, apples keep the doctor away, but not dentists. FML

by SterlingEnigma / 09/25/2009 at 4:43am / United States (Alaska) / Health

Today, I was playing hide and seek with my eight year old cousin. For the past two turns, he had been hiding in the bathroom. I saw the bathroom lights on, yet again, and opened the door with a triumphant "AHA!" It was my Grandma, taking a smelly dump. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2009 at 6:23am / Singapore / Kids