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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18042) - you deserved it (4808)
On 06/16/2012 at 1:45am - misc - by NotGay (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and heavy drinking. Apparently word travels quickly, because everyone now knows that I spent hours lying in an empty bathtub, rubbing shampoo over my body with the expectation that it'd increase my penis size. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5660) - you deserved it (24933)
On 06/03/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Spain (Castilla y Leon)
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23586) - you deserved it (2352)
On 05/01/2012 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by rolyat (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (2416)
On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)
Today, my husband drew a penis on every one of my cigarettes. It's a new pack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5776) - you deserved it (45608)
On 04/21/2012 at 11:15pm - misc - by Jenn P (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I came out to my parents. They still think I'm joking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21890) - you deserved it (3887)
On 04/15/2012 at 12:12am - misc - by Gayeveryday (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I went to family therapy because my mom wanted the family to be closer. When asked what her biggest disappointment was in life, she turned to me and said, "Having a gay son" then patted my hand, smiled, and said "No offense, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31708) - you deserved it (4956)
On 04/06/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by Sadboy (man) - United States
Today, I confided to my dad that my girlfriend had dumped me for another guy. He said "good" and explained that given how overpopulated the planet is, he's actually disappointed that I'm not gay. His advice was: "just wank it off and move on". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16389) - you deserved it (1786)
On 03/30/2012 at 6:21pm - love - by sad (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)
Today, I realised being the only female engineering student sucks. I have exactly one friend, because everyone else is too busy staring at my boobs to have a conversation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19300) - you deserved it (3187)
On 03/27/2012 at 11:54am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I had a terrible nightmare involving zombies slashing and eating at my face. I woke up in terror and urine, and found the slashing was very real: it was my cat pawing my face for me to feed him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15776) - you deserved it (2719)
On 03/25/2012 at 1:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I finally got the guts to text this cute girl at school. I started sending flirtatious texts, only to find out the hard way that she'd given me her boyfriend's number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18322) - you deserved it (4638)
On 03/25/2012 at 12:06pm - love - by Mark Allan (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, as I was walking home from work, I became the victim of a drive-by peanutting. Yes, apparently I'm only worth a bag of nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13086) - you deserved it (1543)
On 03/24/2012 at 9:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16424) - you deserved it (1206)
On 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm - misc - by vanorav (man) - United States (California)
Today, my doctor booked me in for an STD test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said: "Gonna be honest, Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (3584)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by 0stvn0 (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9849) - you deserved it (18548)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 20 May 2013
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