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shadowfly

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shadowfly

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  • Number of visits : 40
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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shadowfly's favorite FMLs

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

#20413704
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40914) - you deserved it (13758)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by brunetteshavemorefun (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

#20035502
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17249) - you deserved it (5777)

On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7508) - you deserved it (24081)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

#19505040
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21862) - you deserved it (4179)

On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19184) - you deserved it (36736)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I finally got the guts to text this cute girl at school. I started sending flirtatious texts, only to find out the hard way that she'd given me her boyfriend's number. FML

#19344485
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24049) - you deserved it (6627)

On 03/25/2012 at 12:06pm - love - by Mark Allan (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26599) - you deserved it (4425)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML

#19292961
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27438) - you deserved it (4030)

On 03/17/2012 at 9:04am - money - by dhbeaver - United States (Virginia)

Today, I have been left home alone, the electricity has cut out, and I am petrified of the dark. I am stuck downstairs making karate noises every few minutes to scare off creepers. FML

#19292918
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21053) - you deserved it (11896)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:45am - misc - by belieber101 - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28054) - you deserved it (5916)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML

#16968738
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30256) - you deserved it (3507)

On 07/04/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by monquiqui (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML

#16255718
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35671) - you deserved it (7276)

On 05/19/2011 at 6:46pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63607) - you deserved it (6025)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was ordering food at McDonalds when a condom fell out and onto the counter. The server looked at me funny before my friend turned around and said, "It's okay, he's never going to use it." FML

#5896652
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28538) - you deserved it (7043)

On 10/19/2009 at 2:36pm - misc - by ThePidgeon (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)



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