sgcaudell

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sgcaudell

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 January 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 957
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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sgcaudell's page activity

Visits<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 12/06/2016 at 3:53pm<b>jessal</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 11:21pm<b>gnlnblt</b> - the 11/05/2016 at 5:02pm<b>username635</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 4:51pm<b>gateface970</b> - the 08/29/2016 at 11:20am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 12:29pm<b>kingofthelawyers</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 11:53am<b>JBChristian</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 6:07pm<b>eviloftwolessers</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 2:21pm<b>istayfd</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 2:12am<b>itskaitiecali</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 4:10pm<b>Talented73</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 11:44am<b>whynot159</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 8:29am<b>Paris25</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 3:19am<b>orangejubejube</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 11:34pm<b>AnAngryyGiraffe</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 6:59pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 6:14pm<b>leagacysgirl</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 4:38pm

sgcaudell's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of sgcaudell's badges

sgcaudell's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

by lovely / 02/26/2014 at 1:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2014 at 2:49pm / Virgin Islands, U.S. / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend proposed: he told me the feeling he gets from being in love with me is the best feeling in the world, even better than the feeling he gets when he poops. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2014 at 10:43am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML

by NNTA / 12/26/2013 at 6:21pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Intimacy

Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

by lonely otaku / 12/25/2013 at 2:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, as a pickup line, a guy said to me, "Yo, can I kiss your vag' under the mistletoe?" FML

by mistletoe / 12/08/2013 at 9:21pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

by LadyLola / 11/25/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

by the_lameo_geek / 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

by Craigslist is Evil. / 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

by fartz / 08/31/2013 at 2:04am / United States / Miscellaneous