selenagomezlover

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selenagomezlover

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 December 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1419
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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selenagomezlover's page activity

Visits<b>insanelocket</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:26pm<b>Grayy</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 7:31pm<b>IronicLights</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 4:41pm<b>jjumprope</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 6:15pm<b>sunfox5508</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:44am<b>SPN_lover666</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:57pm<b>ThisIsMyUsernam</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 9:56am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:32pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 6:00pm<b>batliner56</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:02am<b>chefcow</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 12:07am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:21pm<b>FlabbberGasted</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:38pm<b>Goodliife</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 6:53pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Tthug</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:26pm<b>cieraisacat</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:54pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:15pm

selenagomezlover's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of selenagomezlover's badges

selenagomezlover's favorite FMLs

Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML

by anon / 04/28/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

by BookBabe / 03/25/2012 at 11:34am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

by Illinoisgirl / 02/14/2012 at 9:29am / Hungary (Budapest) / Love

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML

by emma209 / 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

by Oily / 12/16/2011 at 4:08am / New Zealand (Waikato) / Kids

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm / United States / Love

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm / United States / Love

Today, it's my soon to be 12 year old daughter's birthday. On my break at work I texted her how much I loved her and happy birthday. She replied with, "K, when will you be home? Mom won't let me open presents until you're here." Good to know I'm loved. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2011 at 2:55pm / United States / Kids

Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML

by Mandy / 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

by aprilfools22 / 08/17/2011 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML

by chinchilla4404 / 08/02/2011 at 10:17am / United States / Health