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selenagomezlover

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selenagomezlover
  • Town/Country : sydney, australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 December 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 624
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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selenagomezlover's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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selenagomezlover's favorite FMLs

Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML

#19541631
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6155) - you deserved it (75377)

On 04/28/2012 at 10:31am - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML

#19363371
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7485) - you deserved it (21373)

On 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

#19344343
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7313) - you deserved it (28360)

On 03/25/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by BookBabe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20727) - you deserved it (17835)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32860) - you deserved it (2498)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

#18983166
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36937) - you deserved it (8388)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
215 comments

Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML

#18898578
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32053) - you deserved it (2558)

On 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm - work - by emma209 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

#18525865
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23362) - you deserved it (11562)

On 12/16/2011 at 4:08am - kids - by Oily (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13307) - you deserved it (37030)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13307) - you deserved it (37030)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my soon to be 12 year old daughter's birthday. On my break at work I texted her how much I loved her and happy birthday. She replied with, "K, when will you be home? Mom won't let me open presents until you're here." Good to know I'm loved. FML

#18394511
345 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (4339)

On 11/30/2011 at 2:55pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML

#17760005
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19580) - you deserved it (1710)

On 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm - work - by Mandy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

#17497586
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (10493)

On 08/17/2011 at 4:13am - misc - by aprilfools22 - United States (California)

Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML

#17342308
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20808) - you deserved it (64576)

On 08/02/2011 at 10:17am - health - by chinchilla4404 (woman) - United States



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