selenagomezlover

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selenagomezlover

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 December 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1508
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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selenagomezlover's page activity

Visits<b>insanelocket</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:26pm<b>Grayy</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 7:31pm<b>IronicLights</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 4:41pm<b>jjumprope</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 6:15pm<b>sunfox5508</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:44am<b>SPN_lover666</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:57pm<b>ThisIsMyUsernam</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 9:56am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:32pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 6:00pm<b>batliner56</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 12:02am<b>chefcow</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 12:07am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:21pm<b>FlabbberGasted</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:38pm<b>Goodliife</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 6:53pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Tthug</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:26pm<b>cieraisacat</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:54pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:15pm

selenagomezlover's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of selenagomezlover's badges

selenagomezlover's favorite FMLs

Today, I tripped over my dog and landed on my face while trying to prove to my father that I can walk and chew gum at the same time. FML

by anonymous / 09/09/2012 at 2:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML

by UnknownOperation / 09/04/2012 at 9:51am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML

by ipayyourbillsgorramit / 08/24/2012 at 7:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2012 at 1:15am / United States / Health

Today, my mom threw my tampons in the garbage and said that from now on, I'll be buying pads instead. Turns out she read a scare story going around by email that all the local teens are soaking their tampons in alcohol and inserting them anally to secretly get drunk. FML

by jannister / 08/13/2012 at 3:25pm / Germany (Thuringen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

by SingleAgain / 08/03/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, after having stayed up all night studying, all the coffee I'd drank to keep me awake hit my gut with a vengeance. I ended up missing two exams because I was emptying my bowels into the toilet all morning. FML

by eminem blows cock / 06/15/2012 at 12:41pm / Ireland (Kerry) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML

by Danny / 05/28/2012 at 2:02pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Intimacy

Today, my parents think it's so hot outside that it's okay for them to work in the garden naked. FML

by Ladieda / 05/28/2012 at 6:15am / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 9:24pm / United States / Kids

Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML

by themcdave / 05/19/2012 at 4:03am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Work

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

by Damn / 05/06/2012 at 9:53am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML

by thyisnothorses / 04/28/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous