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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend watching a home made sex tape he had previously made with his ex-girlfriend. What's worse than him jerking off to it? He was crying and hugging a pillow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23032) - you deserved it (1756)
On 02/02/2010 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating so I broke up with him. As revenge he threw my PS3 and XBox out of the window when I wasn't in our house. I got those consoles out of the spare money my three jobs had brought in - the same three jobs I had to get because he refused to get a job of his own. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28759) - you deserved it (5704)
On 01/30/2010 at 10:17am - love - by GamerGirl (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)
Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30925) - you deserved it (8326)
On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version
Today, I cut myself deeply with an expensive razor that advertised it's impossible to cut yourself with. Twice. Guess I always was an overachiever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18783) - you deserved it (4635)
On 01/25/2010 at 4:46pm - health - by Thorin (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11529) - you deserved it (3437)
On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (85078) - you deserved it (25503)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (149042) - you deserved it (22383)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32865) - you deserved it (488578)
On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59322) - you deserved it (144027)
On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had a dentist appointment. While waiting, I pulled out my Cosmo magazine to entertain myself. The woman sitting across from me points and tells me I'm reading "Satan's Manual." I told her I don't believe in Satan. She said, "You'll know he's real when you become his bitch!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42905) - you deserved it (5508)
On 05/30/2009 at 7:22pm - misc - by satanlovesme (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping in the dog world meant dominance. Well, I decided to instill my dominance and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22840) - you deserved it (99489)
On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (170873) - you deserved it (52081)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37638) - you deserved it (431087)
On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (377575) - you deserved it (54175)
On 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by gentileman (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28753) - you deserved it (339180)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
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