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scenekid06's FML badges
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scenekid06's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
by Heather / 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
by mm / 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United Kingdom (Warrington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/12/2012 at 1:14am / United States / Transportation
Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML
by KtSue / 11/12/2012 at 12:25am / United States / Health
Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML
by Eganstein / 11/11/2012 at 7:50pm / United States / Love
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy
by mayerstexmex69 / 11/08/2012 at 10:52am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML
by ohcrap / 11/07/2012 at 8:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML
by markderanjer / 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/03/2012 at 8:19pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
by Anonymous / 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy
by hiccups / 11/03/2012 at 11:52am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by heartbroke / 11/03/2012 at 6:02am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/02/2012 at 9:23pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…