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sarcasm_isme

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sarcasm_isme

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 April 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1015
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sarcasm_isme : in a nutshell: im a fitness instructor, am married to an amateur body builder and we run an anti steroid campaign through our gym. Juice Heads go home!!

sarcasm_isme's page activity

Visits<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 3:20am<b>tattooedcowboy</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:07pm<b>cjspenny</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 8:19pm<b>Rozay333</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 2:18pm<b>blueflygon</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:42am<b>TJJOE</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 1:36am<b>FairJ1025</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 7:56pm<b>jmccarley1</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 7:51pm<b>jep1023</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 8:39am<b>Coldinside</b> - the 09/03/2012 at 9:20am<b>LookOnBrightSide</b> - the 05/20/2012 at 2:28am<b>youtubetre</b> - the 05/19/2012 at 5:58am<b>Bobissmall</b> - the 04/22/2012 at 8:10pm<b>Freakkshoooww</b> - the 07/01/2010 at 2:31am<b>j3ssycama3</b> - the 01/02/2010 at 7:39pm<b>brownrug</b> - the 03/24/2009 at 11:32pm<b>marsh</b> - the 03/20/2009 at 1:50pm<b>lolol182</b> - the 03/19/2009 at 6:45pm

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sarcasm_isme's favorite FMLs

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

#16017887
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (41298)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:30am - work - by MathTeacher (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML

#16016488
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8835) - you deserved it (55446)

On 05/02/2011 at 5:33am - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14862) - you deserved it (44693)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, I woke up at 4:40AM and went to the kitchen. My brother and his steel-capped boots easily found me in the dark. FML

#16005260
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24740) - you deserved it (3480)

On 05/01/2011 at 2:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, I was cruising with a coworker and his friend, and I started getting tired. His friend offered me a caffeine pill. It wasn't caffeine. It was laxatives. FML

#15985545
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26583) - you deserved it (7310)

On 04/30/2011 at 12:49am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I returned home after a three-week trip to Jamaica. When I opened the door to my room, I was greeted by a swarm of bees and their enormous nest, which was attached to my doorknob. Apparently, I'd forgotten to close the window properly before I left. FML

#15970719
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24070) - you deserved it (16777)

On 04/28/2011 at 10:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, when I came home from work, my computer was drenched with water. My sister claimed there was smoke coming out of it. FML

#15964444
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28379) - you deserved it (2414)

On 04/28/2011 at 3:29pm - misc - by Tokany (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, my drunk dad started yelling at my dog for not having a job. FML

#15962479
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44929) - you deserved it (4806)

On 04/28/2011 at 11:53am - animals - by Cecilly2010 -

Today, at 6am I was waiting for the tram to go home from my late night job. A homeless man came up to me and offered to buy me a beer because "guys like us have to stick together." FML

#15754863
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30150) - you deserved it (4497)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:02pm - misc - by ihaveahome (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML

#15753750
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10697) - you deserved it (125020)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:01am - health - by sadcase - Australia

Today, I wore a fake wedding ring on my left hand when buying a pregnancy test so the cashier at Walmart wouldn't think I'm a slut. FML

#15738282
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20607) - you deserved it (67876)

On 04/11/2011 at 9:16am - intimacy - by CheeseyPotatoes (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

#15702397
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22895) - you deserved it (11836)

On 04/09/2011 at 12:01am - health - by FistFighter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

#15693395
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11859) - you deserved it (49228)

On 04/08/2011 at 11:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I heard that one of our customers had passed away. Saddened, I told everyone who came into our shop about his death. Understandably, some customers got very upset and one even fainted. Suddenly, the 'dead' man walked into the shop. Turns out I got the name wrong. FML

#15640936
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11079) - you deserved it (37752)

On 04/04/2011 at 8:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Cavan)

Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML

#15550416
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (3567)

On 03/29/2011 at 7:58pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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