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sarbear11753

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sarbear11753
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1901
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sarbear11753's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (6956)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34419) - you deserved it (6615)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11250) - you deserved it (72228)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

#17804951
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (4379)

On 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by failure (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

#17796010
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31059) - you deserved it (3892)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

#17749622
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29825) - you deserved it (5467)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35092) - you deserved it (4804)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

#17710745
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29916) - you deserved it (23295)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:46am - intimacy - by RetroDayDreamer - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML

#17649932
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25680) - you deserved it (2419)

On 09/03/2011 at 1:33am - health - by whatdidIdo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, it was my last day at my dad's. I thought he'd want to say goodbye, instead he told me, "Hope you've got all your shit. Anything you leave, I'm burning." FML

#17649393
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27040) - you deserved it (2181)

On 09/03/2011 at 12:33am - misc - by Panda_Bearr - United States (Michigan)

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24252) - you deserved it (2709)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML

#17564993
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33270) - you deserved it (2972)

On 08/24/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by skichick54 - United States (Washington)

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18674) - you deserved it (39360)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

#17539435
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24720) - you deserved it (2027)

On 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML

#17526704
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58430) - you deserved it (3328)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:26am - love - by AlwaysGottaFML - United States (North Carolina)



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