Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sarbear11753

Offline (the 12/15/2014 at 6:49am) | Search for a member

sarbear11753

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3265
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

sarbear11753's page activity

Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 10:24pm<b>PieReaper</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 5:52pm<b>twilight_lupus</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 9:12am<b>persianninja</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 5:23pm<b>GrantEvans</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 3:49pm<b>saocrates</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 11:18am<b>colerean</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 12:10pm<b>2_Fn_funny</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:44am<b>CorpsmanUp88</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 4:39pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 9:26pm<b>that_band_nerd</b> - the 06/10/2013 at 7:08pm<b>tommyfox</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 3:29pm<b>rm2115</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 3:31pm<b>gmc_blossom</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 2:34am<b>TwitchingNebula</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 5:28pm<b>Manicpanic13</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 7:32pm<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/06/2013 at 4:32pm<b>JustAGirlOnFML</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 8:23pm

sarbear11753's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of sarbear11753's badges

sarbear11753's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49641) - you deserved it (3871)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

#18036176
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6893) - you deserved it (48802)

On 10/21/2011 at 12:57am - misc - by crankg - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (5189) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

#17973250
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33968) - you deserved it (9279)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
431 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34549) - you deserved it (24633)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night. There are eggs, coins and Oreos glued to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house are in the garden. And I'm naked and covered in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon. My parents return in an hour. FML

#17899100
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11794) - you deserved it (48256)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26694) - you deserved it (7982)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37289) - you deserved it (7015)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

#17821676
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13107) - you deserved it (77006)

On 09/24/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by essay2 - United States (California)

Today, my professor snapped and told me that I know nothing, that everything I've ever learned is wrong, and that all of my former teachers should be shot. FML

#17804951
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28044) - you deserved it (4570)

On 09/22/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by failure (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife told me the main reason she married me is because I have a cool last name. FML

#17796010
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32387) - you deserved it (4009)

On 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

#17749622
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32704) - you deserved it (5832)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41570) - you deserved it (6223)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

#17710745
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33125) - you deserved it (25520)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:46am - intimacy - by RetroDayDreamer - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a restaurant with a girl I really liked. She started crying when an overweight family walked in and loudly sobbed about how the parents were "murdering" their children. This made the father of that family try to fight me. FML

#17649932
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31101) - you deserved it (3260)

On 09/03/2011 at 1:33am - health - by whatdidIdo (man) - United States (New Hampshire)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: