sarah8909

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sarah8909

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 35492
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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sarah8909's page activity

Visits<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 2:20am<b>CreatingReality</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 3:41am<b>AnonymousKrew</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:23am<b>xDochx</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:32pm<b>slytherbitch</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 3:03am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:19pm<b>Karamelo</b> - the 04/01/2011 at 6:39pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:29am<b>DrDoofenshmirtz</b> - the 11/12/2010 at 11:10pm<b>shortpants</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 10:44am<b>miltonbradley</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 11:38pm<b>nafur15</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 10:38pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 7:22pm<b>ThisGuy13</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 3:30am<b>username666</b> - the 05/19/2009 at 5:15pm<b>zombieman000</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 8:02pm<b>erichugh22</b> - the 05/17/2009 at 3:50am<b>crazy12</b> - the 05/16/2009 at 11:25pm

Fucked!<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 8:20am

sarah8909's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sarah8909's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

by quadropheniac / 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML

by Ariel / 06/02/2009 at 8:19am / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and parents went out to dinner. As we started the meal, my boyfriend proposed and the restaurant burst into applause. My mother said without hesitation and a large scowl, "If you say yes, I'm leaving." FML

by ThanksMom / 06/02/2009 at 8:06am / United States (Indiana) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, three women came into my work and one was wearing a shirt with a rainbow that said, "We are everywhere". I had just gotten what it was referring to and when I greeted them I ended up saying "Hi gays!" instead of the standard "Hi guys". FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2009 at 6:46am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

by pissingcontest / 05/29/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of two years asked me to marry him so that we can consolidate our student loans. FML

by loserface23 / 05/28/2009 at 3:51pm / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

by alexis89 / 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

by Weezylover / 05/26/2009 at 4:24am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

by lm / 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went shopping with my sister. Looking for something to say, I told her how one of my friends had been burgled. Then I realised it was Bree on Desperate Housewives. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2009 at 9:24am / Ireland (Wexford) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

by Jessica / 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

by TwinDad / 05/14/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while working at a children's day camp, one of the kids who is allergic to peanuts went into anaphylactic shock. I ran and grabbed the boys eppe pen. I was holding it backwards so the injection went into my hand, causing me to pass out and both of us to be rushed to hospital. FML

by MC / 05/14/2009 at 10:11am / Canada (Ontario) / Work