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sannuo

Offline (the 07/25/2014 at 3:31pm) | Search for a member

sannuo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 October 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6115
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sannuo's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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sannuo's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML

#20708788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55744) - you deserved it (5976)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me from jail, expecting me to bail him out. He'd tried to buy a load of booze at the liquor store and came up short by ten cents. The cashier refused to be short-changed, and he figured the only reasonable reaction was to punch her in the face. FML

#20705783
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44495) - you deserved it (4170)

On 06/04/2013 at 4:31pm - misc - by no booze, no boyfriend (woman) - United States

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30749) - you deserved it (65435)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I had to pee in my cat's litter box, just to avoid witnessing my mom having sex in the living room on my way to the bathroom. FML

#20702750
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71926) - you deserved it (5752)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me while screaming, "My precious!" FML

#20701776
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42882) - you deserved it (6973)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65427) - you deserved it (18674)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

#20684256
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37418) - you deserved it (4092)

On 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by unwilling redneck - United States

Today, my 6-year-old son spotted a bumper sticker that said, "Get any closer and I'll fart." He thought this was so hilarious that he had to repeat it to everyone he met. Including my doctor, my grandma, and my boss at "bring your kid to work day." FML

#20682342
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36448) - you deserved it (4803)

On 05/23/2013 at 6:48pm - kids - by Mary (woman) - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML

#20664891
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41407) - you deserved it (9550)

On 05/15/2013 at 11:16am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

#20661280
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38540) - you deserved it (3946)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my cousin thought it would be funny to make copies of my house keys and give it to random people on the street. I live alone and work a 12 hour shift daily. FML

#20657611
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50208) - you deserved it (3188)

On 05/12/2013 at 12:09am - misc - by Baikal - Singapore

Today, I was singing horribly in the shower. Without me knowing, my sister recorded my singing and set it as my ringtone. My phone rang in class and everyone heard it. My new nickname is American Idol. FML

#20649622
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47293) - you deserved it (9970)

On 05/08/2013 at 10:00am - kids - by kprince - United States (California)

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51039) - you deserved it (4431)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

#20636856
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53400) - you deserved it (7499)

On 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

#20622653
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41234) - you deserved it (8835)

On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)



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