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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11750) - you deserved it (24403)
On 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm - animals - by benji - United States (Michigan)
Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32104) - you deserved it (17086)
On 10/30/2011 at 1:31am - intimacy - by Korisite - United States
Today, it was my first day on duty as a rookie cop. Everything was going great, and even the veterans on the force were warming up to me. That is until my mother came into the station carrying a brown bag for my lunch. Written on the bag was, "Lunch for my big boy. I love you, pumpkin." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29928) - you deserved it (4317)
On 10/25/2011 at 2:46pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10657) - you deserved it (12884)
On 10/16/2011 at 10:50pm - work - by Kate - United States
Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML
I agree, your life sucks (24791) - you deserved it (2570)
On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States
Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31175) - you deserved it (2512)
On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32908) - you deserved it (3156)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I pulled a muscle. Not in any kind of sport or exercise, but while reaching for my computer mouse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9930) - you deserved it (24688)
On 08/12/2011 at 4:46pm - health - by ThisGuy97 - United States
Today, my dad nearly had a head-on collision with another car, but I grabbed the wheel at the last second, potentially saving both our lives. He spent the rest of the car trip pissed at me because I'd "interfered" with his driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24068) - you deserved it (329)
On 08/05/2011 at 5:47pm - health - by laurlaur - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He thinks it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52684) - you deserved it (4294)
On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24921) - you deserved it (17857)
On 05/02/2011 at 5:30pm - misc - by spekledworf - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I got a call from a girl I was seeing. She said that she was falling for someone else, but she still liked me and couldn't decide what to do. Being the romantic (idiot) I am, I told her that she should do what would make her happiest, thinking that she would pick me. She didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25726) - you deserved it (14082)
On 04/18/2011 at 12:53am - love - by HFCS (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31360) - you deserved it (5110)
On 03/09/2011 at 4:52am - kids - by Anonymous - India (Karnataka)
Today, I built a snowman. When I'd finished, I went inside to get a scarf and carrot for the nose. As I came back outside, a snowplough ran it over, and the driver waved at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18750) - you deserved it (3754)
On 12/07/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13869) - you deserved it (31380)
On 07/21/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Goody2shoes (man) - India (Maharashtra)
Monday 20 May 2013
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