Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sammygirl517

Search for a member

sammygirl517
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 May 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 471
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About sammygirl517 : I love talking and Taylor Lautner... YAY!!!

sammygirl517's last visitors

ADOmegaLokaSmordecaiandrigbyTvolsfan325debbiess

sammygirl517's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sammygirl517's favorite FMLs

Today, I awakened from my peaceful slumber in a great mood. I walked into my closet, ready to pick out an outfit for the day, to find my two year old daughter, kneeling on the floor with a pair of scissors in her hand, cutting up my wedding dress - my wedding is tomorrow. FML

#5019794
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60506) - you deserved it (12061)

On 09/03/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

#4157667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37727) - you deserved it (24782)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML

#3949576
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44507) - you deserved it (14992)

On 07/22/2009 at 5:48am - misc - by Mortified (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while babysitting, I gave the boy a pen and paper because he wanted to draw me. When he was done, he let me see but then said, "Wait! I'm not done." He took it back and basically colored in the arms. I said, "I'm not wearing long-sleeves." He said, "That's hair." FML

#1807678
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42925) - you deserved it (7181)

On 05/10/2009 at 9:18am - kids - by thesitter (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML

#953150
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57480) - you deserved it (4298)

On 04/13/2009 at 4:09pm - kids - by shizzy09 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, was my first serious photoshoot as a male model for a high-end clothing line. It was a nude photoshoot, with kind of an Adam and Eve theme. After the first couple of pictures with the extremly sexy female model, I got a boner. There were still 100 shots left to go. FML

#512486
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47662) - you deserved it (19251)

On 03/21/2009 at 4:11pm - intimacy - by Bden (man) - United States (Virginia)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: