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samiams00

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samiams00

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 9372
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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samiams00's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:55pm<b>Tchernov9</b> - the 11/23/2009 at 2:10am<b>sdouaji</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 5:55pm<b>boatiebanter</b> - the 05/18/2009 at 7:11pm<b>censorshipoff</b> - the 05/11/2009 at 4:47pm<b>Im_not_here</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 3:35pm<b>morenap</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 9:43am<b>sozo75</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 7:38am<b>Thoams</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 11:50pm<b>raylab810</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 5:16pm<b>nautical</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 5:04pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 4:59pm<b>fYOURlife1989</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 3:14pm<b>AntiChrist7</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 3:36pm<b>Headcase</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 2:52pm

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samiams00's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

#4637795
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56160) - you deserved it (4679)

On 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by Girl - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I lost a bet with my girlfriend. I now have to wear a shirt saying "Worlds Smallest Penis" everywhere I go for a month. FML

#4627317
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18330) - you deserved it (61368)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:34pm - love - by badtimingdude (man) - Mauritius

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

#4623862
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40202) - you deserved it (9021)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:47am - health - by Ahhwtf (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I received a text from my girlfriend to break up with me. I was upset. One minute later another text from her said "sorry, wrong person." FML

#4618484
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61142) - you deserved it (3192)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Kazakhstan (Almaty)

Today, I found out that I'm immune to laughing gas and partially immune to novocaine while I was getting two teeth pulled. FML

#4609790
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49497) - you deserved it (2522)

On 08/17/2009 at 8:14pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

#4596913
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60446) - you deserved it (13251)

On 08/17/2009 at 9:50am - misc - by malebonding (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I noticed my dishwasher wouldn't turn on. After shelling out $120 call-out fee, I was a little miffed when the technician walked in, pressed the 'unlock' function and walked out again. FML

#4594322
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7728) - you deserved it (47477)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by veevee (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went into my Moms room to look for a t-shirt. I went into her drawer and behind all of her clothes was a cell phone. Not only did I not find the t-shirt, I also found out my Mom is cheating on my Dad with someone from work and now I have to pretend like I don't know. I work there too. FML

#4594193
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48398) - you deserved it (4864)

On 08/17/2009 at 4:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend was fired. After breaking the news, he also broke up with me. Apparently, his boss had a creepy crush on me and would give my boyfriend bonuses for bringing me to company events and, occasionally, out on the boss's personal boat. Looks like I am no longer useful. FML

#4591074
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47477) - you deserved it (2710)

On 08/17/2009 at 1:43am - love - by TrophyGirlfriend (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend of 4 years because I didn't know the exact amount of days that we'd been together. FML

#4541155
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57829) - you deserved it (6325)

On 08/15/2009 at 1:30am - love - by fmexgirlfriend (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57123) - you deserved it (4739)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

#4483118
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53108) - you deserved it (19874)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

#4479707
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58301) - you deserved it (2933)

On 08/12/2009 at 5:01pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I got stung by a bee. On my eyelid. I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open my eye. Tomorrow is the first day of a new prestigious school. I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster. FML

#4478482
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42671) - you deserved it (2849)

On 08/12/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Kobenhavn)

Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML

#4476894
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18400) - you deserved it (36515)

On 08/12/2009 at 3:02pm - misc - by signupsheetfail (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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