samiams00

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samiams00

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10902
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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samiams00's page activity

Visits<b>atypicalfuck</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 7:42am<b>idefka</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 8:42pm<b>Noah197099</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:02pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:55pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:23am<b>Tchernov9</b> - the 11/23/2009 at 2:10am<b>sdouaji</b> - the 05/26/2009 at 5:55pm<b>boatiebanter</b> - the 05/18/2009 at 7:11pm<b>censorshipoff</b> - the 05/11/2009 at 4:47pm<b>Im_not_here</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 3:35pm<b>morenap</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 9:43am<b>sozo75</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 7:38am<b>Thoams</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 11:50pm<b>raylab810</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 5:16pm<b>nautical</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 5:04pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 4:59pm<b>fYOURlife1989</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 3:14pm<b>AntiChrist7</b> - the 05/06/2009 at 3:36pm

Fucked!<b>atypicalfuck</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 12:42pm<b>idefka</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 1:43am

samiams00's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

samiams00's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a piss in a port-o-john and thought it would be a good idea to aim at a bee I saw buzzing around. The bee thought it would be a better idea to sting me on the knob. FML

by Bee / 08/31/2009 at 12:28pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted so loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

by minnie / 08/28/2009 at 2:30pm / United States / Health

Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML

by wtfman101 / 08/28/2009 at 10:56am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML

by mariokarter / 08/28/2009 at 12:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation

Today, my five year old daughter told me that while I'm at work, daddy has his wrestling buddy Melinda over. She also said that they wrestle on the bed so that they won't get hurt. FML

by abercrombieef / 08/27/2009 at 7:57pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I wrote a note for my crush of 2 years, expressing all my feelings for him signed it as "Forever your lover" then I slipped it into his locker. Later that day, he walked back up to me, tossed the note at me and said "You know I recognize your handwriting, right?" FML

by fmynote / 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I got home from work, and saw a note on the counter my roomate left saying "Sorry about the basement." I then went into the basement, and found that it was flooded. My TV, Xbox360, mini-fridge, and couch were all destroyed. Good thing he tried to stop the leak with scotch tape. FML

by buzzzzkill / 08/27/2009 at 7:51am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to get food, I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and it was getting hard to breathe. I realized it's a bluebery muffin, I'm deathly allergic. I look to my friend, she was laughing saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML

by Hellohaileyexoh / 08/27/2009 at 12:07am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was told by this big guy from school that I needed to stop stalking his girlfriend, and stop following her home from school. She's my neighbor. FML

by ostfae / 08/21/2009 at 4:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gathered the courage to ask my crush on a date. As I called her, she quickly answered and said "Can't talk right now, I'm in a movie theater." and then hung up. I'd called her home phone. FML

by sophistication / 08/21/2009 at 11:36am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

by anonymous / 08/20/2009 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my little sons into work with me. I introduced them to my boss. She said to my shy kids, "You boys don't know me, do you? I'm Janice." The older one lit up and said, "Oh, I know you, mommy complains about you all the time." FML

by SweetFA / 08/19/2009 at 8:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML

by Dude / 08/19/2009 at 6:32am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML

by Amara1717 / 08/19/2009 at 12:22am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

by Girl / 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Intimacy