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saato

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saato

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saato's favorite FMLs

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

#19710160
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10160) - you deserved it (29649)

On 05/31/2012 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

#19315463
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28146) - you deserved it (3210)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me with a message that I had to pay $1 to see. FML

#18856263
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26773) - you deserved it (3039)

On 01/19/2012 at 8:46pm - love - by Alejandroc - Honduras (Cortes)

Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML

#18819143
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29099) - you deserved it (6696)

On 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm - love - by geeklove - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38738) - you deserved it (7196)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38845) - you deserved it (15617)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML

#16690191
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33667) - you deserved it (3894)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:37am - work - by Hank Gummyworm - United States (Michigan)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49248) - you deserved it (5787)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27994) - you deserved it (54318) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel Lines" because I've got an unibrow and an apparent hairiness over my mouth. By the way, I'm a girl. FML

#13764859
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22859) - you deserved it (14139)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML

#11628877
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28003) - you deserved it (9579)

On 07/03/2010 at 2:49am - misc - by thesadone - United States (California)

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

#8202300
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37928) - you deserved it (3365)

On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States

Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML

#6934352
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7441) - you deserved it (48767)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:10am - work - by harrassment101 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (11848)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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