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russfml

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russfml

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russfmlrussfml
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 31 October 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1502
  • Number of comments : 371
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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russfml's page activity

Visits<b>Setareh23</b> - yesterday at 11:58pm<b>feven</b> - yesterday at 8:10pm<b>Zoeee_18</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:45am<b>twinsfan1999</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:54pm<b>spen731</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 8:52am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:37pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 6:05pm<b>groovy579</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:09pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 10:34pm<b>arrowhead235</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:54pm<b>schrbj</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:20pm<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:18am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:59pm<b>umerin</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:07am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 6:14pm<b>harrypotter322</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 8:59am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 4:57am

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russfml's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30346) - you deserved it (2457)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36315) - you deserved it (3582)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML

#21312671
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30852) - you deserved it (2950)

On 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Belgium

Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML

#21260699
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33553) - you deserved it (5695)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:20pm - misc - by immature - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I saw a customer wandering around, looking confused. I went over and kindly asked if I could help him find anything. He said no, but that he'd help me find the teeth he'd knock out of my mouth if I didn't get lost. FML

#21248418
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34377) - you deserved it (2743)

On 08/30/2014 at 11:14am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50713) - you deserved it (9746)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48471) - you deserved it (8858)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42131) - you deserved it (5973)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44498) - you deserved it (16519)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40614) - you deserved it (9262)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49183) - you deserved it (21256)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I won a big raffle. However, my name is so ridiculous-sounding that they thought someone was playing a prank, and pulled a different ticket. I was too embarrassed to say anything. FML

#21227005
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39866) - you deserved it (11216)

On 08/01/2014 at 7:10pm - misc - by infortunatename - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35514) - you deserved it (6333)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)



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