Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 11/24/2015 at 8:44am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 31 October 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3562
  • Number of comments : 604
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About russfml : Just nah. :)

russfml's page activity

Visits<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:20am<b>blackfire20</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 11:41am<b>ohokaythen</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 5:14am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 6:11pm<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 6:21pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 2:30pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 2:46pm<b>wafflelover</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 11:23pm<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 9:54pm<b>WinterChild</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 11:38am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 6:04pm<b>MathiBears</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 1:58pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 11:33pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 5:55am<b>Weemo04</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:52pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:28am<b>Lacalema</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 2:00am<b>octinate</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 3:22pm

Fucked!<b>MathiBears</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 7:58pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:28am<b>sam882</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 2:11am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:24am<b>Weemo04</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 8:28pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 11:39am<b>LEGATE_LANIUS</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:46pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:02pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 3:42am<b>Secret_Ninjaa</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 6:17pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 5:28pm<b>majesticous</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 4:09pm<b>jessie85678</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 9:49pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 2:13pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 5:02pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 5:10am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 3:31pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:07am

russfml's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of russfml's badges

russfml's favorite FMLs

Today, while looking through my son's browser history, I found a Google search for "stop looking in my history u nosey cunt". I swore last week that I don't invade his privacy, so I can't even punish him for the bad language without looking like a lying bastard. FML


I agree, your life sucks (11770) - you deserved it (41068)

On 10/11/2015 at 7:45am - kids - by Hank-T4 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got called a "politically correct loser" by a woman at the supermarket, all because I said I didn't want to find out the gender of my baby until birth. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21243) - you deserved it (1913)

On 09/30/2015 at 6:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28044) - you deserved it (1896)

On 08/17/2015 at 6:46pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking to my car with 600 dollars worth of books because I start college next week, when I was robbed by some guy that sounded like Cartman. He punched me because I could not stop laughing whenever he would try to threaten me. FML

Today, my current boyfriend was so impressed by my blowjob abilities he sent my ex-boyfriend a message saying thanks. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28328) - you deserved it (5697)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I had to call a coworker to the office via the store intercom. The damn thing didn't turn off properly and everyone heard me say "I hate that asshole. Just be where your dumb ass should be." I realized my mistake a few seconds before my manager stormed in and threatened to fire me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13295) - you deserved it (24708)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:59pm - work - by suspended (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my idiot boss placed an expensive order for anti-bullying banners that read: "Take a stand against bullying!" This would be fine if I didn't work in a specialized school for children in wheelchairs. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23085) - you deserved it (1696)

On 07/05/2015 at 5:29am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my family and I were driving and we passed a strip club called DB's Golden Banana. My 5-year-old sister asked what it was, so my dad said it was a place where people dance. Now my sister keeps telling people she wants to be a dancer at DB's Golden Banana. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26741) - you deserved it (2925)

On 06/26/2015 at 7:32pm - kids - by tycrist8 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, our outgoing boss told us about guy who's replacing him, saying he's very nice but very anal about things. Without thinking, I shrugged and said "Anal's not bad." Now everyone's calling me Anal-Girl. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24395) - you deserved it (8031)

On 06/26/2015 at 3:56pm - work - by very analytical (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my boss confided in me that when a gay person visits his house, he discreetly follows them around and cleans anything they touched and everywhere they sat with disinfectant wipes. I've worked for him for 7 years but he doesn't know I'm gay. FML


Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35164) - you deserved it (1933)

On 06/13/2015 at 8:42am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, a man tried to rob the store I work at. Before the guy was taken by the cops, he complained to my manager for "unfriendly behavior". He took it seriously and bitched me out for not providing "quality service" to our customers. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29490) - you deserved it (1945)

On 06/13/2015 at 7:45am - work - by notfuckingpaidenough - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (36619) - you deserved it (7679)

On 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I overheard my wife telling my mother-in-law I was diagnosed with a learning disability earlier this week. She replied, "I always knew he was a retard. Why did you ever marry that idiot?" All my wife did was mutter "I don't know." FML


I agree, your life sucks (28911) - you deserved it (2181)

On 06/04/2015 at 5:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Maldives (Maale)

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31297) - you deserved it (3976)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by zzarzzur (man) - United States (California)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: