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About runkatrun : What can I say? My life's an unscripted comedy, but as many FMLs as I've had, they all pale in comparison to the ones I see on this site.
Let's cover the basics:
Where do I live? Far, far away.
What's my name? Guess.
How old am I? Young enough to dream, old enough to keep my feet on the ground.
Picture? Doesn't upload.
Questions? Message me.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today... Mah Boss Asked Me To Pick Up Some Supplies For A Presentation. I Entered The Store In The Middle Of An Armed Robbery... Was Knocked To The Floor... And Had Mah Cash... Phone And Credit Cards Stolen. When I Told Mah Boss The Story... She Said... "So Were U Able To Get The Binder Clips?" FML
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wantd me as she pulld closer an closer. Eventually she pulld me in an lickd mah ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break yur collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML
2day I Woke Up With Really Dry, Chappd Lips. Still In Bd, Without My Glasse On, I Sleepily Reachd Down Into My Purse For Some Chapstick And Applid It. Upon Awakening Later I Realizd I Had Mistaken A Mini Sharpie Permanent Marker For Chapstick. I Have A Job Interview Today. FML
Today I went swinging with my friend at the park. Seieng a few cute guys playing basketball I tried to act cute laughing loudly and letting my hair fly all over the place. Just as they look over the swing broke. I fell on my face my jeans sliding down mooning them. They laughed hysterically. real FML
Yesterday, I set AIM statu to be the currently-playing file on iTunes . I've downloaded a lot of porn to iTunes, and I wanted to watch some . My statu changed to ( Grl in Latex gets fucked in the ass . ) FML
Today, my boyfriend looool was in te sower, and I decided to go join im!! I took all my clotes off and stepped into te batroom!! I slipped on some water, and ended up itting my ead on te toilet and passing out!! Wen I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in is towel!! Wrong person!! FML
Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt . When he told me I had tenni elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis" . Then he asked me if I had a grlfriend . When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML
I Decided To Play A Joke On My Boyfriend And Planned To Pretend That I Found A Thong In His Gym Bag . When He Cummed Home, I "confronted" Him . After Struggling Through Putting On My Best Face, He, Unexpectedly Confessed: "Look, Babe, I'm Sorry . It Meant Nothing." Mega FML
Today I Was On A Thrd Date With A Grl. Things Had Been Going Really Well. At One Point The Conversation Lulld. After A Moment Of Silence She Askd Me Wat My Greatest Fantasy Was. I Told Her That It Was Bieng A Superhero. She Told Me That She Meant Sexual Fantasy. I'm 25. FML
Today... as I was gatting my mail... I racaivad a fraa coupon from a babby supply stora saying ( congratulations on yur axpactancy. ) Tinking it was a mistaka... I sowad my girlfriand...o I am living wit. All sa ad to say was ( Surprisa! ) FML
TODAY, MAH BOSS CUMMED BACK FROM A 2 WEEK VACATION . I WAS THE ONLY ONE COVERING FIR HIM, AN I DID AN EXCELLENT JOB . IT WAS MAH CHANCE TO GET A PROMOTION . I ACTUALLY IMPROVED HIS SALES WHILE HE WAS GONE . BUT THE ONLY THING HE NOTICED WAS THAT I KILLED HIS PLANT . FML
Friday 27 March 2015