rookiegrl78

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rookiegrl78

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 3307
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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rookiegrl78's page activity

Visits<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 3:26am<b>kered_iz_kool</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 1:39pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:28am<b>Breighana</b> - the 10/12/2010 at 2:38pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/01/2009 at 11:40pm<b>a1mostevi1</b> - the 07/31/2009 at 2:58pm<b>umka</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 9:50am

rookiegrl78's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

rookiegrl78's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I took a trip to Wal-Mart. There's a car wash that they conveniently built right outside of this Wal-Mart. So as I was leaving, I decided to make use of this car wash, not even thinking about the $200 worth of groceries I had just purchased. I drive a pick-up truck. FML

by dave / 10/27/2009 at 11:36am / United States / Transportation

Today, I was walking down the hall from the livingroom. I overheard my mom telling someone how proud she was of her baby girl and how much she loved her. I thought she was referring to my first ever all "A" report card. Turns out my new kitten used its litter box correctly for the first time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2009 at 12:09pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML

by fmlifetime / 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2009 at 1:22am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

by E.S. / 10/23/2009 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, it was my grandfather's burial. As the family was about to leave, a great aunt came up to my skinny, tall and pretty cousin and told her, "Stay beautiful and kind." Then, she walked to me and said, "And you, Stay kind." FML

by kthx / 10/22/2009 at 8:26am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, being a music student, a professional orchestra performed a symphony that I wrote and dedicated to my girlfriend. It took months to compose and it the first and only time it was ever going to be played. My girlfriend forgot to come. FML

by Ryanissaur / 10/19/2009 at 1:34am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2009 at 9:36am / Sweden (Norrbottens Lan) / Health

Today, I was sleeping next to my girlfriend and I turned over to the sound of her talking in her sleep. Because it was so cute, I was happy and I smiled, until she began to talk about "Troy" and "all the nasty things you can do to me." FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2009 at 8:09am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML

by booste / 10/18/2009 at 12:06am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML

by Few_Absolutes / 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm / United States (Maryland) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I flew in to visit my long distance girlfriend. When I got out of the cab, I saw her way down the street walking the dog, so I hid behind the bushes to scare/suprise her. Mission accomplished. I just wish I hadn't bought her that pepper spray. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2009 at 1:28pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I was looking at my wedding photos. The photographer moved onto the "candid" shots and thought it would be cute to have pics of us making out at the reception. I have blonde hair. The girl in the picture did not. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 6:57pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous