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rolk112

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rolk112
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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rolk112's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML

#20544337
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40323) - you deserved it (1998)

On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

#20529231
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17279) - you deserved it (32639)

On 03/03/2013 at 9:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

#20521590
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34348) - you deserved it (5970)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I came home to find that while my husband and children were mindlessly watching TV, one of our dogs got into the cupboard that stores the deep fryer. He got the lid off, ate all of the old oil and barfed everything up on the couch. FML

#20521278
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21890) - you deserved it (2790)

On 02/25/2013 at 2:25am - animals - by Sammy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that if a jock calls you a nerd in the street and you retaliate with a witty comeback, be prepared to run. Fast. FML

#18911929
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19459) - you deserved it (4745)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:36pm - misc - by JMcKay (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
481 comments

I agree, your life sucks (178221) - you deserved it (61495)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



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