[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

rokai

Search for a member

rokai
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15319
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

rokai's last visitors

rokai's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

rokai's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving my car with expired tags to work. Because I was on the phone I almost missed my turn. So when I made a wide right turn I swiped a cop car sitting at the intersection. I was given a ticket, my car was towed and the cop thanked me for helping him make his monthly quota. FML

#4130274 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (6106) - you deserved it (56890)

On 07/29/2009 at 8:36am - misc - by tatilalicious - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML

#4127495 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (11932) - you deserved it (33715)

On 07/29/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Nikse (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that I look better in different kinds of light. I asked him which kind of light I looked best in. His reply? "No light at all." FML

#4125421 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (33407) - you deserved it (4692)

On 07/29/2009 at 1:42am - love - by Ouch (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, was my birthday. I rented a condo on the beach for me and my friends to stay at, they were supposed to pick me up. They left without me to stay in the condo I paid for. Determined to make my birthday a little better, I went to see what my parents got me. They got me a barbie, even though I turned 18. FML

#4119270 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (37419) - you deserved it (2644)

On 07/28/2009 at 10:17pm - misc - by fmbirthday - United States (Florida)

Today, after four years of anorexia and lots of recovery, my parents took me out to dinner with my counselor and whole family to celebrate my progress. I ended up eating something that made me vomit everything I ate. My parents now think I am bulmic and are sending me back to counseling. FML

#4116964 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (37976) - you deserved it (3318)

On 07/28/2009 at 8:47pm - health - by nothungry (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the grocery store. My checker was very hot. When it came time for me to pay, I swiped my debit card & the machine kept rejecting it. Sure that I had money in my account, I did it again, before the cute checker informed me that I was swiping my driver's license, not my debit. FML

#4114414 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (7117) - you deserved it (33359)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:55pm - misc - by flustered - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

#4113781 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (42479) - you deserved it (6056)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:28pm - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a theater and saw "Bruno" with my mom. We saw "Borat" together, so I thought, 'Hey, how bad could it be?' I don't know what was more nauseating: Bruno's penis spinning around and talking or the fact that my mom thought it was hilarious and couldn't stop laughing. FML

#4111292 (219)

I agree, your life sucks (24103) - you deserved it (17809)

On 07/28/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by porkfriedlife - United States

Today, everyone at work commented on how much better my new haircut looked and how I should keep styling it this way as it's such an improvement over my old style. I was late for work this morning. My new hair style was Bed hair that I didn't have time to sort out... FML

#4109863 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (26549) - you deserved it (5589)

On 07/28/2009 at 3:41pm - work - by Tooks (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had two minutes to get to the bus stop which usually takes me eight minutes. I had to catch that bus to be at work at the hospital in time. I was in such a hurry, I didn't have the time to tie my shoe laces. I ran with untied shoe laces. I did end up in the hospital. FML

#4108973 (60)

I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (9643)

On 07/28/2009 at 2:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Finnmark)

Today, I went to see a movie. While buying tickets, the girl behind the counter asked to show my ID card to proof I'm at least 16 years old. Not wanting to make a drama, I showed it. She took a look at it and declared it as fake. That ID is real and I'm 24. FML

#4107036 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (43405) - you deserved it (1912)

On 07/28/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Limburg)

Today, my family and I were just about to leave the house for the vacation that I had been saving up for 3 years. I was coming down the stairs with a heavy suitcase and I tripped and fell breaking my leg, now my family's gone without me while I'm in hospital. I paid for the vacation. FML

#4106793 (91)

I agree, your life sucks (43672) - you deserved it (2205)

On 07/28/2009 at 1:12pm - health - by broken (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (4471) - you deserved it (77797)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I saw this cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty and asked for her number. She replied "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML

#4102567 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (5402) - you deserved it (77046)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was at my job as a flight attendant. A passenger on my plane stopped breathing and turned blue. As I cleared his airways and was busy strapping an oxygen mask to his face, the passenger behind him tried to hand me her trash. Apparently I'm a walking trash can, no matter what I'm doing. FML

#4100528 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (50366) - you deserved it (1898)

On 07/28/2009 at 3:29am - work - by skygoddess (woman) - United States (Illinois)