About rocker_chick105 : When I was your age, I had to walk to school uphill both ways in the snow.
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rocker_chick105's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/19/2012 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by mustachio101 / 07/17/2012 at 7:30pm / United States (Alabama) / Love
Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML
by ouch / 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML
by purple / 03/24/2012 at 1:30am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I washed my sheets. They wouldn't dry quick enough, so I had to use my old Buzz Lightyear sheets. My new girlfriend took it upon herself to become a damn psychic and pay me a surprise visit right there and then. FML
by babysheets / 03/17/2012 at 12:22pm / Uruguay (Montevideo) / Love
Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML
by danny5191 / 03/16/2012 at 10:21pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Health
by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by SpLo0gIeR / 02/13/2012 at 10:30am / United States / Miscellaneous
by lol / 01/25/2012 at 10:54am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by Anonymous / 01/11/2012 at 7:26pm / United States / Intimacy
by queenlatifa101bebe / 12/09/2011 at 9:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend sent me a sexy picture of herself in my boxers. I thought it would be funny to take a picture of myself in the thong she left in my room and send it to her. She thought it would be funnier on Facebook. FML
by kdeeeceee / 11/05/2011 at 3:25am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm / Reserved / Intimacy
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
- Today, a customer returned a toilet to the store but an associate didn't check it. Later a customer… Today, I found out what it's like to have all my ex's living in the same apartment complex. So far… Today, I was left by my girlfriend of 3 years because I was over-jealous of her male friend because…