rockefoe

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rockefoe

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 May 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6040
  • Number of comments : 180
  • Number of FMLs : 3 confirmed out of 22 posted

About rockefoe : Trying to get an FML published...

Aha! Accomplished on 6/30/10. FTW.

...and on 10/20/10.

...and on 11/15/10.

rockefoe's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 9:01pm<b>youdontsay123456</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 4:27pm<b>Addiction333</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 11:39am<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:12am<b>Kuibe</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:32pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 2:48am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 1:03am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 4:49pm<b>AznLuvsMusic</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 8:20pm<b>TreeTreeMan</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 8:42pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 1:27am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 4:37pm<b>oakcrush</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 9:40pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 5:29pm<b>_delusions_</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 7:53pm<b>crystalbeau98</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 12:41am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:41pm<b>cloud_tsukamo</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 9:18am

rockefoe's FML badges

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You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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rockefoe's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat fell into the bathtub while walking along the rim. This wouldn't have been so bad if I wasn't in it at the time, and if my skin was immune to being sliced open by a frantic kitty. FML

by ouch / 03/25/2011 at 10:27pm / Animals

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, at my wedding, my brother decided it would be funny to trip me as I was walking down the aisle, in front of hundreds of people. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

by Jonathan / 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm / Denmark (Midtjyllen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have a cat with separation anxiety. By this, I mean whenever I go in another room and shut the door with her outside, she uses her head as a battering ram to try and break down the door. It's fun trying to sleep too. FML

by nosleeptilpissoff / 03/18/2011 at 11:54am / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

by WTF / 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm / Health

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

by Anon / 03/10/2011 at 10:08am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I found out the hard way that if you think a waiter is hot, you probably shouldn't tell your parents. They could react by screaming at him across the room to tell him you think he's a hottie. FML

by anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 12:34am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:22am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML

by Acesup111 / 03/02/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

by Anon. / 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2011 at 11:21am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy