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About roamkicksass : I love fml(: wanna meet new peeps!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34412) - you deserved it (1799)
Today, I refused to let two students into class because they were 15 minutes late. It turns out they were late because they had gone to buy me a birthday cake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8305) - you deserved it (47335)
On 05/24/2011 at 5:34pm - work - by LimeyGoodteeth (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)
Today, my car ran out of gas. I was 20 feet away from the gas pump and the only person I could ask for help was the attendant, who'd asked me out a week ago. I'd said no, and so did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22360) - you deserved it (10390)
On 05/19/2011 at 7:46am - misc - by stranded (woman) - United States
Today, my 53 year-old art teacher told me she's excited about going clubbing this weekend. I'm excited about watching a special on the History Channel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20971) - you deserved it (4421)
Today, my boyfriend dumped me. He said he would have done it two weeks ago but he needed someone to drive him around while his car was getting repaired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34158) - you deserved it (2978)
On 05/16/2011 at 6:15pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while driving my new car, a squirrel ran in front of me so I slammed on my brakes. The person behind me didn't notice and rear-ended me. The squirrel got hit by a car going the opposite direction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24519) - you deserved it (11678)
On 05/15/2011 at 2:42am - misc - by Username - United States (Indiana)
Today, I went to my phone company and had my text history pulled. Why? Because a few days ago my 4 year old daughter told me that, "Daddy has a wife and a girlfriend." Turns out she was right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35460) - you deserved it (2859)
On 05/14/2011 at 7:35pm - love - by Clueless (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I walked in on my brother slipping into a pair of panties. Specifically, a pair of my panties. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (2791)
On 05/13/2011 at 7:06pm - intimacy - by Uhmm... - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my mom said she wanted me to get laser eye surgery before she did, "Just in case it isn't safe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27353) - you deserved it (1874)
On 05/13/2011 at 3:18pm - health - by samadams42 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was sitting in the lecture hall. A girl walked by to get to her seat and her dress got caught on the handles, lifting it up. She didn't notice but I did, so I tried to take it off the handles. She turned around to see me holding her dress up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27307) - you deserved it (5593)
On 05/13/2011 at 1:45am - misc - by ctop (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize and I was hit with a big stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31190) - you deserved it (6185)
On 05/13/2011 at 12:02am - misc - by phant776 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I saw my dad chugging a beer in the garage. Why is that so bad? He was hosting an AA meeting in the basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22513) - you deserved it (1751)
On 05/12/2011 at 10:19pm - health - by Eric -
Today, my boyfriend came home from a camping trip and broke up with me. All because when he was watching the lake he was near, ripples formed. Apparently, this means God was telling him I'm impure and unable to be "saved by Christ" and therefore, a waste of his time. I dated this lunatic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26657) - you deserved it (5859)
Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10082) - you deserved it (38243)
On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)
Today, as I was filling out divorce paperwork, I realized that my son has had the same girlfriend through both of my marriages. He's 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14180) - you deserved it (35100)
On 05/12/2011 at 7:09am - love - by Username -
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