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  • Number of visits : 1886
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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riley0_0's page activity

Visits<b>TigerTattoo</b> - the 08/06/2010 at 6:34pm<b>_yayfml_</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 1:47pm<b>ndawgg</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 9:09am<b>FuckingDucks</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 8:34am<b>ch2358</b> - the 07/29/2009 at 11:36pm<b>blacknote</b> - the 07/15/2009 at 11:47pm<b>Toas7</b> - the 06/29/2009 at 12:29pm

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Today, I went shopping with my two sons and my wife. We got separated after a while, and I spotted my son in the video game section of the store. I snuck up behind him and playfully slapped him on the back of the head. The kid turned around and it wasn't my son. His mom was none to happy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13291) - you deserved it (46493)

On 07/02/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by Kronic (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought my cat a nice big bag of expensive anti-hairball catfood, so she'd stop puking hairballs on my things. After eating it, she started running around wildly, howling and projectile vomiting on EVERYTHING. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48462) - you deserved it (6903)

On 06/06/2009 at 9:17am - animals - by Jay (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was performing in an orchestra concert. My stand partner and I commented on people in the audience the whole time, saying how fat they were, etc. Towards the end of the concert, I realized we were sitting right by a microphone, and the whole audience could hear us. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10319) - you deserved it (99331)

On 06/04/2009 at 7:35am - misc - by anon (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was working at my retail job. A customer stopped me on my way to break saying "someone" had broken a snow globe. She showed me where it was and I cleaned it up with her circling me. I finished and put the cleaning supplies away when I heard a 'crash' as the same woman dropped another snow globe. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50681) - you deserved it (2354)

On 06/03/2009 at 9:35pm - misc - by kilo1_13 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML


I agree, your life sucks (92306) - you deserved it (241089)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my super creepy live-in uncle standing in the kitchen holding a pair of my underwear and smiling at it, humming to himself. He didn't see me. I stood there for at least 30 seconds in shock, and when I backed away he was still looking at them. FML

Today, there was a parents bike race on the track at my high school for a fundraiser. My dad entered, and ended up winning. He did his victory dance with a massive erection showing through his spandex. Just about all of my friends, teachers, other parents, and the hot soccer team saw. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64229) - you deserved it (3892)

On 06/01/2009 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by biker2012 (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53823) - you deserved it (8716)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63727) - you deserved it (14350)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by FMLFMLFMLFML (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (54876) - you deserved it (3329)

On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML


I agree, your life sucks (18414) - you deserved it (72490)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

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