Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ribbons

Offline (the 07/25/2014 at 11:09am) | Search for a member

ribbons

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 May 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1102
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About ribbons : FML moderation: procrastination fodder for ever - and all time!

I make a face like my avatar *every* time someone doesn't capitalize proper nouns or use apostrophes in an otherwise hilarious submission. STOP BREAKING MY HEART!

ribbons's page activity

Visits<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 3:04am<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 2:07pm<b>zeriously95</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 5:00pm<b>ThomasBombadil</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 8:43pm<b>Chokobolt</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 3:58pm<b>turtles4life</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 3:51pm<b>Owlfarm612</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:58pm<b>obsolol</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 4:44am<b>JokerJim2013</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 3:20pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 2:06pm<b>RubbarDuckie</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 7:42am<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 8:26pm<b>birdierising</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 5:27pm<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 8:59pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 10:08am<b>LittlestPrincess</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 7:00am<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 5:54pm<b>Casper19</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 10:25am

ribbons's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of ribbons's badges

ribbons's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was on the floor stocking a bottom shelf, a man walked up behind me and humped the back of my head. He ran away laughing. This kind of shit happens all the time. I hate my job. FML

#19218186
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28030) - you deserved it (2523)

On 03/05/2012 at 12:12am - work - by cero_kewl - United States

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36817) - you deserved it (2695)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML

#18868671
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25884) - you deserved it (8458)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Russian Federation

Today, I took my car to a drive-through car wash. It wasn't until after my back seat was filled with foam and I had been squirted in the face that I realized my back seat window was rolled down. FML

#18812717
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7198) - you deserved it (31710)

On 01/15/2012 at 4:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30945) - you deserved it (2399)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30945) - you deserved it (2399)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that the dog stay in our bedroom while we had sex. He said it would prove his dominance, and "show the dog who's boss." My boyfriend needs to prove his self-worth to an animal. FML

#18473863
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32733) - you deserved it (4559)

On 12/10/2011 at 2:23am - intimacy - by HBC - United States (Texas)

Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML

#18424133
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37206) - you deserved it (5106)

On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was called by a restricted number. The man on the phone then explained to me in detail what I was doing at every second that I was on the phone with him. I'm scared to leave my house. FML

#18304644
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45813) - you deserved it (2818)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by bizzyizzy0121 - United States

Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML

#18281989
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25864) - you deserved it (2792)

On 11/18/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML

#17675757
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12532) - you deserved it (23857)

On 09/05/2011 at 10:52pm - health - by wheezy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, in the flat I share with four students, I broke our toaster. The night before, they'd successfully managed to toast chicken soup-covered crumpets in it whilst drunk. I tried to toast a teacake, and the whole thing exploded in flames and smoke. Our toaster got taken out by a raisin. FML

#17620390
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20340) - you deserved it (3474)

On 08/30/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by gofixmyhead (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30276) - you deserved it (3410)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML

#17493123
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29596) - you deserved it (2399)

On 08/16/2011 at 8:05pm - kids - by Awesome (woman) - Russian Federation

Today, my mother resolved to never visit McDonald's again. Not because of ethics or health concerns, but because they charged her for extra barbecue sauce. She bitched out the man in the drive-through for a good five minutes, while I sat awkwardly in the passenger's seat. FML

#17018036
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27125) - you deserved it (2858)

On 07/07/2011 at 7:07pm - misc - by AgentFreshers (woman) - United States (Arizona)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: