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regalarius

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regalarius
  • Town/Country : ?, Kentucky, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 49376
  • Number of comments : 123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About regalarius : I'm a 24-year-old married system administrator / programmer.

A mite on the abnormal side, maybe.

regalarius's last visitors

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regalarius's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

regalarius's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

#3113124
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60190) - you deserved it (4699)

On 06/22/2009 at 5:03am - intimacy - by fml (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend called me and I told him about the AnimeCon I'm attending, and that I wanted to go as Sailor Mars, he told me he had no idea what that was. After being mad for about ten minutes, I realized that I wanted to break up with him over not knowing what Sailor Moon was. FML

#3108036
520 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9066) - you deserved it (73534)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML

#3078421
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53093) - you deserved it (20751)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I were having sex in the shower while our 5-year old was sleeping. Apparently, she wasn't sleeping and she asked me what those loud noises were. I told her I was singing. Now I can't get her to stop "singing" in the shower. FML

#3058885
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16332) - you deserved it (53507)

On 06/20/2009 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9216) - you deserved it (87765)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML

#3016666
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14121) - you deserved it (97523)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by kat9232000 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mom had one too many and announced to all of my friends that, if she had the opportunity, she would bang Gwen Stefani. FML

#2959113
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48615) - you deserved it (3993)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while on my daily jog, I passed a very attractive girl. While passing her, she yelled "hey cutie". Trying to look cool, I tried turning around without stopping. I then fell off the curb and severely sprained my ankle. She caught up to help but was laughing the entire time. FML

#2949089
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9825) - you deserved it (31753)

On 06/16/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I picked up my 17 years old daughter after a late night movie in down town and got pulled over by a cop. He questioned us for a solicitation. I told the cop that she was my daughter but he said "so you are the daddy" and laughed. Good to know that my daughter looks like a ho and I a perv. FML

#2940204
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55845) - you deserved it (5330)

On 06/16/2009 at 1:22pm - intimacy - by enderw (man) - United States

Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML

#2938815
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39926) - you deserved it (25191)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70137) - you deserved it (17109)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got into an argument with a 7 year old. He said that Obama was the 44th President, I said he was the 42nd. Guess who was right. FML

#2791177
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7937) - you deserved it (62387)

On 06/11/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by feeldumb - United States (New York)

Today, I was playing a medieval game with my brother, when he took all of his character's clothes off and said, "Let's have sex!" I looked at him and said, "UH YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" He turns and looks at me, smiling and says, "But not in the game!" I am a 19 year old girl. He is 12. FML

#2780499
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66476) - you deserved it (4550)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Sylvania - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a 3rd date with a great guy. Over dinner, he told me that he wanted to see more of me. When I agreed, he pulled out his schedule book and started to tell me he was dating 5 other women besides me. He then told me what week in the "rotation" would be mine. He wasn't kidding. FML

#2624413
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53248) - you deserved it (3785)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by shescomfortablynumb (woman) - United States (Florida)



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