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redreynard

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redreynard
  • Town/Country : Las Vegas, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 June 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 754
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About redreynard : P.

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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redreynard's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31666) - you deserved it (14224)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35977) - you deserved it (22602)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67067) - you deserved it (6316)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28324) - you deserved it (18978) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31798) - you deserved it (6817)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

#13893197
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24579) - you deserved it (5325)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He is the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

#12438405
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27431) - you deserved it (7779)

On 08/10/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by verno02 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13373) - you deserved it (52179)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a close friend pointed out to me how ironic it is that I make the Sim version of myself work out to lose weight, while I sit on my fat ass playing video games. FML

#11318182
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7915) - you deserved it (44522)

On 06/19/2010 at 8:40pm - health - by Grace (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

#7556761
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15584) - you deserved it (39856)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Ben (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my friends let me win at strip poker so I wouldn't take off my clothes. FML

#7293209
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27774) - you deserved it (5441)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by Absent - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13335) - you deserved it (3815)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

#6927698
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5387) - you deserved it (65528)

On 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by paidback - United States

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

#6665165
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14514) - you deserved it (3188)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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Thursday 10 April 2014

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