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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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rectim34

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rectim34
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1660
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I was masturbating in my room when my dog started to bark obnoxiously. He does this all the time so I ignored it and kept going. This went on for about a half hour. When I went downstairs, I found an open door and an empty TV stand. FML

#691341 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (14494) - you deserved it (64606)

On 03/29/2009 at 10:08pm - animals - by trainE - United States (Michigan)

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909 (375)

I agree, your life sucks (138243) - you deserved it (18734)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

#615927 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (11877) - you deserved it (54302)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having a one night stand with a guy. he told me he wanted to do it doggie style. I said okay, and as soon as i bent over on the bed, looked at me and said "let's do this with the lights off". FML

#232006 (64)

I agree, your life sucks (38341) - you deserved it (8380)

On 03/07/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by fjafja - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and about 30 seconds in he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek and leaves. Turns out he already came. I call his phone - wrong number. FML

#139747 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (65185) - you deserved it (14216)

On 02/25/2009 at 11:51pm - intimacy - by jsw029 (woman) - United States (Illinois)