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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I woke up to discover that the guy I hooked up with last night did indeed have a mullet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11303) - you deserved it (39226)
On 03/08/2013 at 1:01am - intimacy - by WeHitTurbulence (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38126) - you deserved it (4756)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, after supporting my girlfriend for over a year in her endeavour to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better, my now-slender girlfriend dumped me. Because now she can do "so much better". FML
I agree, your life sucks (38204) - you deserved it (2698)
On 02/23/2013 at 3:07am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30074) - you deserved it (1847)
On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13176) - you deserved it (1676)
On 12/03/2012 at 12:18am - health - by Gahh... (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was visiting family in Oregon. I did not know it was illegal to pump your own gas; the cops were involved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19332) - you deserved it (1386)
On 11/12/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I got fired for saving my company upwards of $6,000. I'm as confused as you are. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20852) - you deserved it (1295)
On 09/17/2012 at 6:46am - work - by Grindwhore - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was hanging out with my brother and his friends. While we were walking to the store, there was a loud snap. Everyone jumped. My bra had snapped, and I had to hold back tears of pain and pretend I was just as confused as they were, while they searched for the source of the sound. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18259) - you deserved it (1609)
On 08/15/2012 at 7:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15533) - you deserved it (1639)
On 08/14/2012 at 8:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, it's my birthday. Today is also the day my grandma died, six years ago. Since then, I get to sit through any sort of attempted celebration while my mom sobs and drinks herself into a stupor in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18284) - you deserved it (868)
On 08/14/2012 at 3:57am - misc - by BirthdayFail (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend told me that because he works fifty hours a week, I should be meeting an arbitrary quota of fifty hours of housework, and if I don't, I'm insensitive and ungrateful. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15299) - you deserved it (7188)
On 07/05/2012 at 3:34pm - work - by lazy pregnant girl - United States
Today, at a party, I told a joke to my crush. He didn't even smile. An hour later, I heard my model friend tell the exact same joke to him. He said it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23629) - you deserved it (1654)
On 06/24/2012 at 7:39pm - love - by egc573 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while watching TV with my boyfriend, I was telling him that I wasn't looking forward to "getting older" and turning thirty in three days. Five minutes later, he said, "I never knew you had so much grey hair already" and then offered to help me dye them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12543) - you deserved it (2562)
On 06/22/2012 at 2:02am - misc - by Username (woman) - United States
Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40914) - you deserved it (2359)
On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21196) - you deserved it (3743)
On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - misc - by uhhh what? - United States (Washington)
Friday 24 May 2013
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