rasengan1544

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rasengan1544

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4462
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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rasengan1544's page activity

Visits<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 9:08am<b>codexishere</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 8:56pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Kami123</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:18am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 12:35pm<b>DavidKnows</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 4:15pm<b>ImNachoFriend</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Micayla</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 1:40am<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 4:25am<b>Mermhun</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:18pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 8:01pm<b>RodzillaX</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 5:49am<b>SerenaSerenadex3</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 12:03pm<b>GoingCommando93</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 12:08pm<b>Elfroid</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 6:19am<b>team_cookies</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 1:40pm<b>dontpanic</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 9:45am<b>CVTTRVN</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:16pm

rasengan1544's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of rasengan1544's badges

rasengan1544's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to unpick a wedgie in the street. I backed against a wall, lifted my skirt and sorted it. I then turned around and caught eye contact with several men in the barbers behind me. Not such a solid wall after all. FML

by chattyloz / 02/07/2013 at 7:31am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

by fviz / 02/07/2013 at 4:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

by PokeWife / 02/06/2013 at 8:38am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

by NewlyDread / 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a shower, my dad jokingly asked if I was jacking off in the shower because I was taking a long time. Before I could respond, my mom chimed in with, "No, he does it before he showers, haven't you noticed how he locks himself in his room?" She was right on the money. FML

by Lockedinroom / 02/05/2013 at 11:18am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML

by swarm20 / 02/05/2013 at 12:24am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML

by facepalm / 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, after weeks of practice, I proudly did 9 chin-ups on my chin-up bar. As soon as I was done, my 11-year-old daughter came over and banged out 12 of them. Then she wiped her sweaty hands off and did 8 more. Then she gave me pointers on my technique. FML

by WeakerThanaLittleGirl / 02/04/2013 at 8:00pm / United States / Health

Today, I was washing the dishes at work. I had to pee really bad but first I wanted to finish the dishes. A coworker jumped out from behind the ice machine. I screamed like a girl and pissed my pants. FML

by klovemachine / 02/03/2013 at 10:50pm / United States / Work

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

by FUCK GOD / 02/03/2013 at 6:04pm / Argentina (Salta) / Love

Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm / Australia / Love

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2013 at 2:32am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

by Brock / 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love