rasengan1544

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rasengan1544

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4768
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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rasengan1544's page activity

Visits<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 9:08am<b>codexishere</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 8:56pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Kami123</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 11:18am<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 12:35pm<b>DavidKnows</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 4:15pm<b>ImNachoFriend</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Micayla</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 1:40am<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 4:25am<b>Mermhun</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:18pm<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 8:01pm<b>RodzillaX</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 5:49am<b>SerenaSerenadex3</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 12:03pm<b>GoingCommando93</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 12:08pm<b>Elfroid</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 6:19am<b>team_cookies</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 1:40pm<b>dontpanic</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 9:45am<b>CVTTRVN</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:16pm

rasengan1544's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of rasengan1544's badges

rasengan1544's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:42am / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend and I stressed out preparing for our one week holiday. We packed for the whole day, said goodbye to everyone and arrived at the airport quite exhausted after a 45-minute train ride. Turns out our flight isn't until tomorrow. The check-in lady couldn't stop laughing. FML

by Tickettoride / 05/04/2013 at 6:24am / Austria (Wien) / Holidays

Today, I finally started exercising. I'm a rather obese person and I'm super pumped up to finally get off my lazy butt and lose some weight. Locking myself in my room, I first started with a very simple exercise: jumping jacks. I farted each time I jumped. I jumped 10 times. FML

by thatonesilentkidinclass / 05/04/2013 at 4:11am / Philippines (Batangas) / Health

Today, I found out that every time my girlfriend takes a big dump, she pretends as if she's giving birth and screams uncontrollably. I just moved in with her. FML

by poopydaddy / 05/03/2013 at 7:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

by future brain bleach addict / 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, I had a giant Scantron test. After putting 10 answers, I noticed every single answer was A. I got freaked out and started putting random answers. Turns out every answer on the test was A. I failed. FML

by FireoftheFuture / 05/02/2013 at 7:02am / United States / Work

Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I realized my favorite pen advertises a vaginal cream. I've been letting people borrow it for months. FML

by MrConcise / 05/01/2013 at 12:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 11:55am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML

by luvs2spooge89 / 05/01/2013 at 10:27am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2013 at 2:24pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

by SecondBest,IGuess / 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my fiancée broke off our engagement. For some bizarre reason, she'd hidden a pair of expensive boots and her iPad underneath our ride-on mower. I turned the mower on and destroyed both without realizing it. According to her, the fault is all mine. FML

by Wow. Really? / 04/29/2013 at 2:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Love