[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

randomaccountnam

Search for a member

randomaccountnam
  • Town/Country : Poole, United Kindgom
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 6 April 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 811
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

randomaccountnam's last visitors

FreezenerdsgetmehotpendatikQTp13jessxoxo28Person1233

randomaccountnam's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

randomaccountnam's favorite FMLs

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (37878) - you deserved it (1612)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I was walking back to campus with my boyfriend when we passed an Irish pub called "Fat Belly's." He put his arm around me, patted my stomach, and said "Yay! It's your restaurant!" FML

#13841183 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (19063) - you deserved it (4660)

On 11/14/2010 at 1:54pm - love - by freedomofmusic (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

#13840378 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (19063) - you deserved it (5260)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:18pm - kids - by nicki - United States (Illinois)

Today, whilst working as a language assistant in Germany as part of my degree, some 9 year-old German kids asked me to please speak English to them because my German was so poor. FML

#13139163 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (9809) - you deserved it (13021)

On 09/21/2010 at 3:10am - kids - by themildthings (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I went to a museum that had random exhibits of wax people in the hallways. We were taking pictures of what we thought to be a waxwork old lady. Turns out she was real. FML

#13138405 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (13587) - you deserved it (6266)

On 09/21/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by yourmom - United States (Georgia)

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

#13137769 (299)

I agree, your life sucks (5274) - you deserved it (50039)

On 09/21/2010 at 12:49am - animals - by awesome - United States (Arizona)

Today, I crawled into bed naked, wanting to get some and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass and said 'oh' then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

#13069724 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (24331) - you deserved it (3934)

On 09/16/2010 at 1:13am - intimacy - by bonesniffer (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was telling my friend about how my boyfriend never does anything nice for me. Confused, she replied, "That's odd, he's always doing nice things for me." FML

#13037540 (211)

I agree, your life sucks (26969) - you deserved it (2636)

On 09/13/2010 at 6:24pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my husband won't talk to me because he got mad when I asked him what he thought about 'that lame performance last night'. He doesn't believe that I really was talking about football. FML

#13033071 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (20219) - you deserved it (5815)

On 09/13/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by GonnaBeLonley2night - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML

#13027296 (264)

I agree, your life sucks (30133) - you deserved it (4183)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:29pm - intimacy - by nickim756 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months said he wasn't going to break up with me, he was just going to stop touching me. FML

#12972343 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/09/2010 at 1:33am - intimacy - by karebear - United States

Today, I had to do something that many young technologically-savvy people fear. I had to get on my dad's Facebook for him to delete a rather scandalous photo of his genitals he accidentally uploaded. FML

#12955617 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (27824) - you deserved it (1955)

On 09/07/2010 at 10:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML

#12931199 (200)

I agree, your life sucks (9133) - you deserved it (34659)

On 09/06/2010 at 8:50am - intimacy - by sad-sexed (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML

#12694516 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (23433) - you deserved it (15395)

On 08/23/2010 at 1:05am - intimacy - by diesel444 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575 (276)

I agree, your life sucks (35974) - you deserved it (10384)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)