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random_ribbons

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1025
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About random_ribbons : I could very easily write an autobiography here, but to put it simply, just don't take me too seriously. If you listen to that rule, we'll get along fine.

random_ribbons's page activity

Visits<b>kangarookie</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 6:49pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 4:19pm<b>Austin6112</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 11:17pm<b>StahpMaster</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 2:28am<b>Caps_hockey</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 6:21pm<b>lizziemo79</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 12:26pm<b>lennelleong</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:39pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 7:42pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 8:18pm<b>emala1096</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 11:55am<b>TheChelseaSays</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 2:58am<b>jolie21</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 5:59pm<b>shoopd</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 6:28am<b>JohnzSexyMamas11</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 12:44am<b>hayhay2301</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 5:53pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 3:40pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 3:47pm<b>mangoboy1</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 3:24pm

random_ribbons's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

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random_ribbons's favorite FMLs

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

#20455481
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27440) - you deserved it (4560)

On 01/12/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML

#20432522
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20002) - you deserved it (16074)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by fuckinghicks (man) - United States

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15080) - you deserved it (34891)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41615) - you deserved it (8163)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, while at the airport waiting for my flight, I sat down next to a mother and her son. As I pulled out a water bottle, she leaned over to her son and said, "Promise me you will never do what the man next to you just did." I have no idea what the hell I did wrong. FML

Today, it's been a week since I've been in hospital. No one has been to visit me. The nurses have nicknamed me "The Lonely One." FML

#20071345
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (1611)

On 09/14/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by lonely one - United States

Today, after having a long talk with my mother about gays, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grand kids." FML

#20070762
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25996) - you deserved it (4577)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by EvilMother (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML

#20064659
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18522) - you deserved it (3410)

On 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm - health - by Char (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I discovered a large and somewhat disturbing whitehead inside my ear crevice. Apparently it's been there for a while, because everyone at work has nicknamed it Hugo. FML

#20063555
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18802) - you deserved it (2532)

On 09/08/2012 at 6:39pm - work - by me - United States

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

#20062989
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24495) - you deserved it (4983)

On 09/08/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML

#20061927
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24693) - you deserved it (2919)

On 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm - work - by PuddlePirate (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I discovered how pathetically introverted I am when during a car ride with my family, I said, "I really like this song" and my parents gasped because they didn't realize I was in the back seat. And I'm their only child. FML

#20005160
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24966) - you deserved it (2065)

On 08/06/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by mississippi123 - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML

#19991658
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33279) - you deserved it (5016)

On 07/29/2012 at 11:24pm - misc - by guy - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML

#19990524
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22773) - you deserved it (5048)

On 07/29/2012 at 8:20am - kids - by fml - Japan (Saitama)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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