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rainbowsorbet

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rainbowsorbet

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rainbowsorbet's page activity

Visits<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:21pm

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rainbowsorbet's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (3625)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (3625)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37713) - you deserved it (12636)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37713) - you deserved it (12636)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

#20526564
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35399) - you deserved it (6786)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41149) - you deserved it (7190)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 14-year-old son showed me a "bird's egg" he was looking after in his room. It was a dried up dog turd. FML

#20451321
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28245) - you deserved it (7426)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:28am - kids - by Facepalmum (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML

#20436185
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36457) - you deserved it (6237)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)

Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML

#20164114
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (8237)

On 11/15/2012 at 8:37am - love - by SweetStuff88 (man) - United States

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29637) - you deserved it (2399)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My mom didn't buy me a present, throw a party, or acknowledge the event in any way. Last week it was our dog's birthday, which included a party for all the neighbourhood dogs, and a cake for our dog, made out of bacon. FML

#20134676
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30667) - you deserved it (1753)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:14pm - animals - by birthday girl (woman) - Australia

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about extinct peoples, and I said how close the Jewish people came to becoming one. She condescendingly told me they don't exist anymore. When I asked what she was talking about, I realized she was confusing them with the Vikings. What the hell? FML

#20126556
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20995) - you deserved it (2682)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by tempted to become single (man) - United States (California)

Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

#20117729
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20166) - you deserved it (2325)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:33am - misc - by triple l (woman) - United States

Today, I went to my dentist of four years. After the cleaning, the hygienist and I scheduled my next appointment, and she briefly left the room, leaving my file open on the computer. The data in a field called "NOTE" caught my eye: "Sissy. Freak. Always late. Ask about family or will flirt." FML

#20080189
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8334) - you deserved it (24175)

On 09/20/2012 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

#20071176
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36455) - you deserved it (2319)

On 09/14/2012 at 1:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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