Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

radiocaf

Offline (the 02/05/2016 at 2:49am) | Search for a member

radiocaf

1Fucked!

radiocafradiocaf
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7730
  • Number of comments : 328
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

radiocaf's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 6:41am<b>PuckYouToTheFace</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 9:31am<b>GeorgiaBea</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 6:04pm<b>LPac5295</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:38am<b>amer9298</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 6:48pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 11:14pm<b>sa5v</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 9:42am<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:03pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 10:09am<b>Seashells77</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 10:39pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 1:10am<b>ThatGingerKid56</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 4:35pm<b>emmarawr17</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 7:41am<b>weezypanda420</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 1:13pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 7:06am<b>ScarletSarah</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 1:51pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 2:09am<b>novdestiny</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 2:21pm

Fucked!<b>emmarawr17</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 1:41pm

radiocaf's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of radiocaf's badges

radiocaf's favorite FMLs

Today, I made some brownies to take over to my dad's place for his party. He started yelling at me when I told him I'd added a special ingredient for taste, demanding to know what I had slipped them. Cinnamon. It was cinnamon. FML

Today, I was taking a long, relaxing, hot bath with my girlfriend after a long day. She had fallen asleep in my arms and everything was perfect - until I noticed the water around us had started turning yellow as she pissed herself in her sleep. FML

#21473282
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29035) - you deserved it (2748)

On 09/27/2015 at 12:05pm - intimacy - by itsbeenalongday - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend is as punctual as a German train; I woke up to see her taking a dump into a plastic bag in our bedroom, all because my roommate was using the bathroom and she had to leave for work on time. FML

#21472641
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24576) - you deserved it (1825)

On 09/25/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by WakeUpToADream (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was waiting in the McDonald's drive-thru and listening to some music. I was tapping my non-driving foot to the song when I accidentally tapped the wrong foot and rear ended the cop car in front of me. Whoops. FML

#21471997
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11402) - you deserved it (26093)

On 09/23/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by stardustveins (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

#21470063
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31844) - you deserved it (2809)

On 09/18/2015 at 10:56pm - intimacy - by Lady Vulva of the Redwater (woman) -

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

#21469567
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35413) - you deserved it (2451)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML

#21469489
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22888) - you deserved it (5065)

On 09/17/2015 at 10:54am - misc - by mother teresa was a cunt (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML

#21469447
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27877) - you deserved it (1525)

On 09/17/2015 at 7:13am - misc - by Ryoichi (man) - Germany

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML

#21469191
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25696) - you deserved it (1746)

On 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm - animals - by Urinator - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML

#21469165
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26249) - you deserved it (3108)

On 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Japan

Today, I was signing with my deaf brother at a local McDonald's. We were having a laugh about a game we played last night when this morbidly obese woman waddled over to us. She was utterly convinced we were "talking shit" about her and made a scene about our "hand gestures." Seriously? FML

#21468899
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28001) - you deserved it (1404)

On 09/15/2015 at 6:31pm - misc - by Stairs? Noooooo - United States (California)

Today, my teacher plugged the speakers into the wrong input on his computer, and said, "Oops, wrong hole", to which one of the students who often makes the same mistake said, "Story of my life". I understood it differently and started laughing. It would have been fine if the teacher wasn't her father. FML

Today, I dropped my toothbrush. Because I have the spatial awareness of a mentally-retarded gnat, I hit my head against the sink as I bent down to get it. Then I did the same on the way back up, almost KO'ing myself. My boyfriend saw the whole thing and nearly pissed himself laughing. FML

#21467535
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23974) - you deserved it (4502)

On 09/12/2015 at 4:11am - health - by dammit (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I told my nephew to be careful when crossing the street in front of a bus because it might eat him. We then watched as a bus slowed down and stopped in front of a group of people. When the bus moved away, all the people were gone. My nephew is terrified, and won't stop crying. FML

#21467423
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16242) - you deserved it (20786)

On 09/11/2015 at 8:32pm - kids - by busmonster - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my mom, legs spread and changing her tampon, all while she was carrying on a conversation on the phone. FML

#21467305
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26031) - you deserved it (4174)

On 09/11/2015 at 2:40pm - intimacy - by lobotomy pls (man) - United States (Virginia)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: