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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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rachelroller

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rachelroller
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12092
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About rachelroller : My life sucks, why do you think I'm on here?

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Today, I learned that "Je suis excité" does not mean "I'm excited" in French. It means "I'm sexually excited"... more or less. I've been doing a lot of exciting things and using it a lot the past two weeks. With my French friends, people I meet, and especially with my host family. FML

#5391347 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (25161) - you deserved it (9692)

On 09/21/2009 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my grandma wasn't feeling well, so I went to her house to check on her. After about 20 mins, I knew she was feeling better when she looked at me and said "So do you have a boyfriend yet? I pray everynight that I get to live long enough to see you with a boyfriend." FML

#5364824 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (26856) - you deserved it (2517)

On 09/20/2009 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in class, playing online poker and keeping up my winning record. I eventually got seated against a guy who beat me at every hand. I heard laughing behind me after I lost all my winnings. The guy behind me had just made an account, looked over my shoulder, and won all my money. FML

#5333449 (96)

I agree, your life sucks (10952) - you deserved it (35040)

On 09/18/2009 at 3:15pm - money - by shushingmoon (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while shopping at Victoria's Secret with my friend, I saw a man holding a lacy bra up to his chest. When my friend and I passed by, I whispered, "Ew, what is that perv doing?" The "guy" immediately turned around and snarled, "I'm a woman, you little bitch," and threw her bra at my face. FML

#4990557 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (7122) - you deserved it (42961)

On 09/02/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by lifeishorrible (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML

#2914098 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (40093) - you deserved it (9664)

On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my best guy friend, who I have loved for years. I was talking about school and all of a sudden he said "I love you." I flipped out saying "Oh my god, oh my god. I love you, too!" He responded with "what?" He was talking to his mom, who was walking out the door. FML

#2537729 (452)

I agree, your life sucks (51708) - you deserved it (10822)

On 06/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710 (1201)

I agree, your life sucks (55738) - you deserved it (136047)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I thought I'd finally make a step towards getting over my ex-fiance by flirting with a cute waiter. I left him a note on the bill. He comes back, says "which one of you is [name]?" and leans down close to me to say, "Thanks for your note, but your card was declined." FML

#2203706 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (38531) - you deserved it (5457)

On 05/23/2009 at 2:43am - love - by Mel (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

#1980136 (407)

I agree, your life sucks (48360) - you deserved it (37871)

On 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by madzlovesgee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying 'I'm good' or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML

#1972272 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (49953) - you deserved it (17809)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went out on a first date with a cute guy. Turns out we won't be going on a date again because I didn't know the difference between "Star Wars" and "Star Trek." FML

#1968718 (451)

I agree, your life sucks (23087) - you deserved it (43978)

On 05/15/2009 at 5:17pm - love - by not4geeks (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML

#1767727 (715)

I agree, your life sucks (7946) - you deserved it (137362)

On 05/09/2009 at 12:43am - work - by pizzagurl (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking: "What can I get for you cuntie?" FML

#1751488 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (60653) - you deserved it (16265)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working as a makeup artist in the mall, I was approached by a man who wanted to try lipstick (not unusual we do a lot of drag). While I'm applying it he starts to make gross noises and after a quick glance I realize he has a massive erection. He then whispers mmmm don't stop now. FML

#1745966 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (63473) - you deserved it (2591)

On 05/08/2009 at 10:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was running on a track above a basketball court. I noticed several cute guys playing a pick-up game, so I tried to run my hardest. Not paying attention, I didn't hear when they warned me about the ball flying towards me. It hit me in the head, I then ran into a wall and face-planted. FML

#1739978 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (13202) - you deserved it (26162)

On 05/08/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States