Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

pyro276

Search for a member

pyro276
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 November 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 785
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

pyro276's last visitors

pyro276's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of pyro276's badges

pyro276's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years confessed that at first, she'd only dated me to get her friend jealous, and that even now, she "only kind of liked" me. I bought a ring only a few days ago, and was planning on proposing to her. FML

#15522363
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43153) - you deserved it (3460)

On 03/27/2011 at 10:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I kissed a boy I have liked since the first day of university. I was thrilled until he followed it with, "Right, I don't think we should tell anyone this happened. Not that they'd believe it anyway." He then patted my ass and walked away. FML

#15512355
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32111) - you deserved it (3837)

On 03/27/2011 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I would be ecstatic if he hadn't stuck the ring on his balls and asked for a blow-job. He even confessed that the original plan was to stick it on his penis but it was too small. FML

Today, after 3 years at my job I received a 14% raise. I was informed I will be transitioned from hourly to salary. I will now be making $1500 LESS than I made last year. FML

#15504213
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31411) - you deserved it (2808)

On 03/26/2011 at 9:28pm - money - by fml - United States

Today, I was going to my prom. My mom knows I want to drink so to prevent me, she made sure I took my prescription medicine before I left. I guess her way of stopping me from drinking is killing myself If I do. FML

#15503138
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13738) - you deserved it (33194)

On 03/26/2011 at 8:26pm - health - by coolkid111 - United States (New York)

Today, my girfriend of two years told me she wasn't actually a lesbian and our relationship was more of a 'learning experience'. FML

#15501357
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48153) - you deserved it (9976)

On 03/26/2011 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my friend what form of birth control she used the first time she had sex. She stared at me like I was from another planet and said, "You can't get pregnant the first time..." This moron is my best friend. FML

#15500038
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43135) - you deserved it (7045)

On 03/26/2011 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Thatslife (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML

#15493619
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (15172)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, in front of my family, my brother's wife announced that she was pregnant with their first child. Everyone joked around and said I was next. Two weeks ago I found out that I'm sterile. FML

#15487602
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45080) - you deserved it (2730)

On 03/25/2011 at 8:07pm - health - by dazzla08 -

Today, I went to the hospital as my girlfriends emergency contact. When I saw her, she was under a blanket because she had no pants. She had a seizure in a guy's bed and he brought her here. He's here and she wants us both to stay. FML

#15473081
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48380) - you deserved it (3773)

On 03/24/2011 at 9:30pm - love - by tannerpaul -

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42540) - you deserved it (6477)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

#15470057
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37956) - you deserved it (3126)

On 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm - misc - by phantomdriver - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my twelve year old neighbour decided to give a Hannah Montana concert in her backyard, starring herself. Unfortunately, she only knew three lines of the song "The Best of Both Worlds" and screamed them repeatedly at the top of her lungs. FML

#15467016
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33423) - you deserved it (4126)

On 03/24/2011 at 3:07pm - kids - by Angie (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML

#15451762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37249) - you deserved it (9485)

On 03/23/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by Cxisbest (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

#15448080
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31645) - you deserved it (10082)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm - animals - by Username - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: