purpleiscool

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purpleiscool

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2767
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About purpleiscool : Um yeah.

purpleiscool's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:22pm<b>broomhildo</b> - the 07/18/2011 at 7:34pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:52am<b>southparkfan92</b> - the 03/31/2010 at 9:21pm<b>cutebebe778</b> - the 07/04/2009 at 6:08pm<b>Jared1James</b> - the 06/23/2009 at 10:51am<b>roundnproud</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 7:12am<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 9:33am<b>jncwmnd</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 7:06am<b>katelyns</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 5:09am<b>FmlFtwAndISFU</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 6:15pm<b>pineapples</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 3:30pm

purpleiscool's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

purpleiscool's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

by chelserusera / 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

by Familyskank / 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML

by Noname / 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

by Noname / 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Japan (Fukuoka) / Health

Today, I was jerking one off and my cat jumped out of nowhere and dug his claws into my shaft. Attempting to knock him away resulted in three nasty gashes... that I now have to explain to my wife. FML

by stanDman / 01/19/2009 at 1:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone was trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I went onto my balcony and asked if everything was okay, and if she needed anything. She and her boyfriend shout back in unison: "We're F*ing, go away". FML

by ehbe / 11/27/2008 at 3:52am / Intimacy