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purpleiscool

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purpleiscool
  • Town/Country : Somewhere in California
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2387
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About purpleiscool : Um yeah.

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purpleiscool's favorite FMLs

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

#1930454
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14309) - you deserved it (87478)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:46pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

#1918683
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55584) - you deserved it (6605)

On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

#1690188
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90315) - you deserved it (19966)

On 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Familyskank (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML

#264253
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27833) - you deserved it (49556)

On 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

#2729
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42670) - you deserved it (2041)

On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)

Today, I was jerking one off and my cat jumped out of nowhere and dug his claws into my shaft. Attempting to knock him away resulted in three nasty gashes... that I now have to explain to my wife. FML

#1752
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30846) - you deserved it (8579)

On 01/19/2009 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by stanDman - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone was trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I went onto my balcony and asked if everything was okay, and if she needed anything. She and her boyfriend shout back in unison: "We're F*ing, go away". FML

#398
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32263) - you deserved it (7057)

On 11/27/2008 at 3:52am - intimacy - by ehbe - Sent from mobile version



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