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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43585) - you deserved it (4464)
On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States
Today, I called my dad at his new wife's house to inform him I was all set to graduate from community college with my associates degree and that we needed to sit down and plan how to pay for the 4 year degree. To which he replied "all a girl needs is an associates degree". Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21046) - you deserved it (3083)
On 03/18/2010 at 8:20am - money - by Anna (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mom told me that she doesn't want me to help any of my friends get a job at the restaurant I work at. Apparently, she thinks that they would do a better job than me and get me fired. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16411) - you deserved it (2777)
On 03/18/2010 at 7:15am - work - by son (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10346) - you deserved it (23073)
On 03/18/2010 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, the love of my life sent me a text saying "touch my pork". Somehow I don't think my feelings are mutual. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13396) - you deserved it (2693)
On 03/18/2010 at 6:24am - intimacy - by burgeee - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7417) - you deserved it (29100)
On 03/18/2010 at 4:21am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the couch. I got thirsty, so I got up and grabbed a metal water bottle and drank out of it. He tried to playfully touch it and spill water on me, but instead hit it hard enough to where it slammed my mouth, chipped my tooth, and cut open my lip. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20694) - you deserved it (2762)
On 03/18/2010 at 3:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had my wisdom teeth removed. The sympathetic words from my boyfriend asked if this meant I could open my mouth a bit wider for him now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16959) - you deserved it (3827)
On 03/17/2010 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by smiler (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was walking down the hallway when someone opened a door, smashing it into me. The bump makes it look like I have a third boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16397) - you deserved it (2499)
On 03/17/2010 at 12:16pm - health - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I took my girlfriend of five and a half years to family dinner at a restaurant. After we all had finished dessert, I got down on one knee, pulled out my great grandmother's ring and proposed. The entire restaurant was dead silent. She looked around and then slowly walked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56541) - you deserved it (4287)
On 03/17/2010 at 11:38am - love - by david (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I did my laundry. When I took it out, everything was clean, including the mouse that had been hiding in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20192) - you deserved it (3226)
On 03/17/2010 at 11:22am - misc - by socksoffire (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, the guy I hooked up with last weekend texted me that I needed to "landscape my front lawn." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7392) - you deserved it (16268)
On 03/17/2010 at 8:48am - intimacy - by Bushfan101 - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25639) - you deserved it (3462)
On 03/17/2010 at 3:05am - love - by Girl (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26025) - you deserved it (2888)
On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -
Today, I called my dad to tell him my boyfriend had proposed to me, and that we're planning on being married this summer. He was surprised at the short engagement, so I said, "Well, we're almost 30." Dad replied, "Wow, I left your mom when I was 35!" So not the conversation for that information, Dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16411) - you deserved it (2192)
On 03/17/2010 at 1:09am - misc - by rainonmyparade (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
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