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princessbits

Offline (the 09/07/2014 at 3:11am) | Search for a member

princessbits

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1676
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About princessbits : (insert long, humorous description of myself here)

princessbits's page activity

Visits<b>Killer67a</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:17am<b>mollykg</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:05pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 5:19pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:03am<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 3:23am<b>Tuffmuffin</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:10am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:36am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:51am<b>ezrocks4u</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Ilikepie467</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 10:36pm<b>Tbearshy</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 10:49pm<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:50pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 3:55pm<b>Koalax3</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:24pm<b>Ellamare</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:09am<b>frostedpuffs</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 10:53am<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 7:06pm<b>amoredeniro</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 10:45pm

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princessbits's favorite FMLs

Today, my teacher was talking about anorexia and bulimia. Midway through the lesson, she stopped and knowingly asked if I wanted to share my experiences with the class. I don't have an eating disorder, just a screwed-up metabolism. FML

#20904715
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50892) - you deserved it (2988)

On 10/02/2013 at 2:37pm - health - by 94lbs of muscle -

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41833) - you deserved it (5337)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

#20898181
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66742) - you deserved it (4060)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML

#20874571
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53454) - you deserved it (6207)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, who has frequent night terrors, also sleepwalks. And apparently sleep-pisses on the bathroom rug. FML

#20872688
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40868) - you deserved it (3134)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:07am - love - by laundry day again... - United States

Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML

#20872521
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46489) - you deserved it (4613)

On 09/08/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML

#20871774
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44033) - you deserved it (3417)

On 09/07/2013 at 5:43pm - work - by goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend tried to get me to wear curly wig, so I could pretend to be Harry Styles in bed. FML

#20863117
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48455) - you deserved it (6173)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML

#20860284
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43649) - you deserved it (2820)

On 08/30/2013 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while working at a client's house, I noticed that their sliding calendar was several months off. I fixed it. Later the daughter saw and started crying. Apparently the date was the last one her mother had set it to before she died. FML

#20857966
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30794) - you deserved it (52919)

On 08/28/2013 at 2:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, whilst out shopping with my crush, I decided to jokingly try on a silly-looking dress in an overly-expensive shop. Apparently I took the wrong size as I couldn't get out. Not only did the shop assistants have to publicly cut me out of the dress, I had to pay for it. FML

#20853472
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25958) - you deserved it (41521)

On 08/25/2013 at 8:50am - misc - by jameen - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75696) - you deserved it (4221)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66953) - you deserved it (7896)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58195) - you deserved it (4585)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

#20753667
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40353) - you deserved it (7995)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by damniphone - Canada (Alberta)



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