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premier22

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premier22

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 60
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About premier22 : Baseball player for Premier Baseball Academy. Hope to be in the MLB someday.

premier22's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

premier22's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a ticket on my motorcycle for not parking in a designated spot. The space I had parked my bike in was occupied by a large van. Some asshole had moved my bike. FML

Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML

#20131002
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24577) - you deserved it (2181)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:14am - misc - by bill - United States (Maryland)

Today, just for old time's sake, I decided to jump on my bed. I ended up hitting my head on the spinning fan and knocking myself unconscious. FML

#20114543
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9683) - you deserved it (30495)

On 10/13/2012 at 2:45am - health - by lalalalainie - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my brother sticking his erect penis through a donut. I doubt I'll ever be able to unsee this. FML

#20113997
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34747) - you deserved it (2846)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was sitting in the park with my new dog; I got her from the pound last week. We were enjoying the sun when I noticed that every time a black person walked past, she'd bark like crazy. Great, my dog is a racist. FML

#20097984
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (2631)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:10am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

#20086472
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19745) - you deserved it (5672)

On 09/24/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by smashed (man) - United States

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59329) - you deserved it (3049)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML

#20058507
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23596) - you deserved it (4675)

On 09/05/2012 at 4:14am - love - by steve (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML

#20035502
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17202) - you deserved it (5776)

On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States

Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML

#20035075
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29286) - you deserved it (1717)

On 08/22/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML

#20027548
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37868) - you deserved it (2195)

On 08/18/2012 at 1:15am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

#20008924
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24791) - you deserved it (2400)

On 08/08/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

#19995362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22273) - you deserved it (1385)

On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned why one should never insert a tampon after squeezing lemons. FML

Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML

#19965581
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28147) - you deserved it (2734)

On 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by divorce? i think so (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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