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Today, I was hanging out with mah new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house fir the first time. Tapd to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazond with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML
my mothar cummd back from har trip to Vagas. Har braast wara obviously 2 lattar sizas largar. I askd if sha got a boob job and sha danid it , saying that it's against har raligion. Sha's an athaist , and a liar. FML
Today, mah bast friand was taxting ma about har sick dog. Sha wrota "Do u think sha will gat battar?", so I wrota "I hopa sha doas". It wasn't until latar that I raalizd I accidantally wrota "I hopa sha dias" instaad.
yesterday I was with mah mom and mah boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and mah mom excitedly says ( You have friends! ) As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says ( Kidding, it's just me. ) My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
Friday 27 March 2015