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Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6256) - you totally deserved it (1197)
On 01/02/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by xxxzzzooo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8548) - you totally deserved it (2647)
On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1736) - you totally deserved it (5730)
On 12/13/2009 at 3:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I found out that my fifty-five year old uncle had taken my phone and texted my girlfriend saying "I'm his uncle, send tit pics." She did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9470) - you totally deserved it (901)
On 11/02/2009 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by whatthef - United States
Today, my girlfriend was giving me amazing head. I was really getting into it, when she looked up, and gave me a thumbs up. I can never take oral sex seriously again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3875) - you totally deserved it (6577)
On 10/30/2009 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by man (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, i walked into the bathroom and saw my beautiful girlfriend of 9 months shaving her face. Seeing my shocking reflection she says "Honey, we need to talk". She proceeds to tell me that she was born a man and had a full sex change the year before she met me. Yes, we've had sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20345) - you totally deserved it (2659)
On 09/29/2009 at 1:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13294) - you totally deserved it (2337)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, naked myself as it seemed convenient. He disapproved, proceeding to scratch my manparts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with a blood infection, swollen manparts, and an 8" needle hole in my butt where I had to get antibiotics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9297) - you totally deserved it (41917)
On 09/03/2009 at 3:55pm - health - by keeperstride (man) - United States (California)
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36744) - you totally deserved it (8424)
On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she randomly asked me "does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked "does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (117625) - you totally deserved it (14042)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)
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